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THE BRITISH THREAD

 
 
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Nov, 2006 06:26 pm
I have been a bookie old chap. I know everything there is to know about betting. I have played cards up from snap to bridge, and monopoly, for money, the latter resulting in fighting on not a few occasions, and have mixed with racehorse and greyhound trainers and have a passable familiarity with statistics and fixes.

You can have 6-4 against feminism by 2050. It will look like flat earthing by then. An embarrassing experiment.

Did you notice Ms smorgs saying that she would-

Quote:
be done for excessive use of the whip


I have noticed the eyes of ladies light up at the thought on many occasions. In fact TV often pulls the trick on its dozing viewers. Even the Manhattan Queen herself fell for it once in my infancy.

It has had me wondering. Is this fascination with whipping men due to-

1-A big act undertaken for financial gain off masochists.

2-A characteristic of over indulged ladies wih not enough pullovers and socks to knit.

3-A training fantasy.

4-Or just for the hell of it.

It is exclusively a feature of rich and successful societies in which the sort of puerile display of flattened out wood pulp with ink inserts, which Walt produced a copy of, of obsequiousness towards the female form, suitably veiled of course, is commonly to be seen and drooled over by the abject supplicants and which implies, like the beer ads in hot deserts, a desperate thirst.
0 Replies
 
smorgs
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 01:23 am
Good Morning everyone!

Am I the first up?

Whipping?

Just for the hell of it...

x
0 Replies
 
smorgs
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 01:24 am
Did anyone watch Horizon last night?

We are all decended from aliens

(that explains a lot)

x
0 Replies
 
dadpad
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 01:29 am
Can anyone tell me the result of Australia V Ghana football friendly at Loftus rd. I'm guessing thats in London
0 Replies
 
lmur
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 01:35 am
dadpad wrote:
Can anyone tell me the result of Australia V Ghana football friendly at Loftus rd. I'm guessing thats in London


1-1.

Aloisi with a penalty after 27 minutes, Agogo equalising in the 75th.
0 Replies
 
the prince
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 01:39 am
I am up as well...

No No, not that way...
0 Replies
 
Lord Ellpus
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 01:40 am
smorgs wrote:
Did anyone watch Horizon last night?

We are all decended from aliens

(that explains a lot)

x


Nope, I missed it, as I was continuing my hunt for a telly. Sounds interesting though.

(Good morning, by the way)
0 Replies
 
McTag
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 03:30 am
I'm going to B & Q to get some wood.
0 Replies
 
Steve 41oo
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 03:48 am
Mathos wrote:
Don't be so bloody soft, I reckon you miss the pub to avoid getting a round in Stevie boy:- You cockney's are as tight as a ducks arse, and that's waterproof!
dont you ever call me a cockerney again you hear. I'm doing missionary work in these parts. Beer sampling is in the job description.
0 Replies
 
Steve 41oo
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 03:54 am
Walter Hinteler wrote:
McTag wrote:

Well that's most impressive, is that. Aye.


And to get it in exchange for an antique Renault! C'est délirant!
Peugeot 205 diesel with 155k mi on the clock. (Brompton is worth 3 times the car Very Happy )
0 Replies
 
Steve 41oo
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 04:01 am
Lord Ellpus wrote:
smorgs wrote:
Did anyone watch Horizon last night?

We are all decended from aliens

(that explains a lot)

x


Nope, I missed it, as I was continuing my hunt for a telly. Sounds interesting though.

(Good morning, by the way)
surely it was where you left it mi lord. Think hard, where were you last watching telly? Is it propped up on the wash basin in the lavatory? Have you checked the corner of the lounge?
0 Replies
 
smorgs
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 04:05 am
Brings a whole new meaning to 'morning wood' Embarrassed

x
0 Replies
 
Steve 41oo
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 04:06 am
McTag wrote:
I'm going to B & Q to get some wood.
Did you hear about the guy in the States who used his B & Q card all over the place to get discounts....from Republicans thinking it stood for Bush and Quayle? A true story. What does it stand for? I really want to know now. Have fun with wood. Thats my comments for now bye bye

ding ding.
0 Replies
 
Lord Ellpus
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 04:18 am
Steve 41oo wrote:
Have you checked the corner of the lounge?


You're brilliant Steve! It was right there. Christ only knows where it went to last night, although I have a sneaking suspicion that it was next door, as their Toshiba is on heat at the moment.
0 Replies
 
Lord Ellpus
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 04:22 am
Steve 41oo wrote:
Bush and Quayle? A true story. What does it stand for?


Very nearly, Steve. It was originally called "Block and Quayle", after the two guys who founded the company.
0 Replies
 
Lord Ellpus
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 04:26 am
...and for all you Dylan freaks.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxs3WsNiGO8&mode=related&search=

I'm going to buy the album today, if I can find it.
0 Replies
 
Mathos
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 05:08 am
My youngest grandson calls it Bang and Quang, (don't ask me why)

Stevie-boy, if your supping the crap they have on offer down there and living amongst 'em, yer a cockney!

Boiled beef and cabbage!

Can't blame you for wanting to deny it, but it's the habits you will pick up, all those silly phrases, apple and pairs etc... Then there are the drinking habits, flat tasteless and in 90% of the pubs, served in plastic pint pots. Come on Stevie, how low do you want to get?
No chance of saving them either mate, they are the Nations lost cause.

Couple of poss's for today.

EW suggested.

Kempton

4.20 Gwilym 14/1

6.20 First approval 16/1

As for you Spendi Bookie and all eh? must have a few quid then my old son. I never yet met a poor bookie. Put £500..00 a piece on them Spendi £250 EW. If you come up trumps I want 20% of your gross, if they turn out fo a stroll I can grin at you.

It's casual betting from my point of view ugly boy, so don't let it worry you.

Laughing to myself though, you will have been watching every forecast like a cat on a hot tin roof.

Now't wrong with the knout either a sexy dame dressed up in fancy trim and long thigh length black boots. They'll make you beg for mercy son. Can you take it?

Strangely enough, I happen to know a couple of 30 odd year old 'flash looking lasses' who are into that sort of thing. They live well, fancy cars, clothes, good lifestyle from all account. Before you ask, I met them by accident as well, I was doing some maintenance work on a house I rent out and they live next door. They asked me to look at their plumbing, I had to go into the cellar and it was kitted out like a bloody dungeon, never seen anything like it. They offered me a free-bee to square the job up, but I declined. A bit too close to home you might say. Glad I didn't too, I heard since they make sneaky video's of the punishment regime.

I could probably put a word in for you Spendi, get you a reduced rate?

Let me know. I could go along and make sure they don't take any video's of you getting whipped and kicked in the goolies whilst suspended naked from the ceiling!

Just had my third rabies injection, arms sore and I have to work this afternoon.
0 Replies
 
Mathos
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 05:11 am
Now them cockney's seem good and likely candidates to be descendants of aliens....


Don't they! :wink:
0 Replies
 
Lord Ellpus
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 05:25 am
Mathos wrote:


Stevie-boy, if your supping the crap they have on offer down there and living amongst 'em, yer a cockney!

Boiled beef and cabbage!

Can't blame you for wanting to deny it, but it's the habits you will pick up, all those silly phrases, apple and pairs etc..
..

"Apples and PEARS" is so yesterday. Saying that we always use rhyming slang makes you sound like a right James Hunt. We only use it occasionally, and only when appropriate. :wink:

Mathos wrote:

Then there are the drinking habits, flat tasteless and in 90% of the pubs, served in plastic pint pots. Come on Stevie, how low do you want to get?
No chance of saving them either mate, they are the Nations lost cause.
.

Lost cause? ........So THAT'S why so many tens of thousands of you prefer to live down here, in god awful London and the home counties!

You're all trying to save us.

MARVELLOUS!
0 Replies
 
McTag
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Nov, 2006 05:48 am
Steve 41oo wrote:
McTag wrote:
I'm going to B & Q to get some wood.
Did you hear about the guy in the States who used his B & Q card all over the place to get discounts....from Republicans thinking it stood for Bush and Quayle? A true story. What does it stand for? I really want to know now. Have fun with wood. Thats my comments for now bye bye

ding ding.


It was two guys with Irish names, Boyle and Quigley, something like that, originally.
You could Google it.
0 Replies
 
 

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