Pregnancy and The Husband

Sorry, Im no bloke but just had to say that that sounds awful!!Hope the feeling ends soon!

Can you work out specifically why you feel down?
Is it definately to do with the pregnancy?Are you feeling left out?

I am not a husband but I could see where at this point, you might start to feel more alone or less important. Everyone is focused on her. Everything in your lives is revolving around her. Maybe she's been a little down or different (hormones) and you don't feel that connection with her right now. I think that it's normal. But you should definitly talk to her about it. Just because you don't want to flip out one day and she'd be like "Where the heck did that come from? and it would turn into a big huge fight when it could have just been a little argument.

I think just feeling left out .

WHen we had our first , the whole pregnancy was different and i was definately happy all the way to the end .

This ones different , shes more tired , gets easily upset , goes to bed now at 9pm .

Im bored , stressed , angry , just heaps of emotions going on . I find the fact that she goes to bed earlier is giving me more time to think which is a bad thing .

We moved into our new house not even a year ago and our relationship has just gone from average to outstanding , its been great and i just feel like this pregnancy has taken it all away .

Its all being selfish i guess but hey , i said it and am wondering if anyone has been through it and how long it lasts or is there things to do to get me out of it . ( yes i do have hobbies but you cant do them 24 hours day )

BD , as far as everyone paying her the attention , nah , thats now what im depressed about , in fact it doesnt even bother me , this is her thats having the baby and good to her , its just the after feeling when its just us 2 together

Do you talk to her about the pregnancy?Or is she doing it all herself as she knows what to expect this time?
Is she talking to others and not you?

""" BD , as far as everyone paying her the attention , nah , thats now what im depressed about """

Was supposed to read " thats NOT what im depressed about "

Im definately talking to her about how she feels , give her the hip massages every night as shes saw , get her her tea , help out around the house . I can say im pretty supportive .. could be more supportive but am doing more than enough i reckon at this stage .

I realise what shes going through as she feels fat and ugly and unsexy she says all the time so im not going to bring my problems onto her as well so no .. havnt mentioned my issues with it .

If you talk to her about your issues it may take her mind off her issues.
Its a partnership, it goes both ways.

I wish pregnant women wouldnt feel bad about the way they look, they are pregnant!!They should give themselves a break!!!

[quote="

I wish pregnant women wouldnt feel bad about the way they look, they are pregnant!!They should give themselves a break!!![/quote]


LOL ... first pregnancy , she went tummy out and was definately glowing happy , this pregnancy , shes only 4.5 months and gone wide instead of belly out and is same size now than what she was at end of first pregnancy and always dry reaching or vomiting .... if i was in her shoes , id be feeling same symptoms as she .

Ok, but my point is that they should give themselves mentally about a year out of having to think they have to look tip top magazine model amazing!!
They should let it all hang out, puke, breast feed in public, be incontinent etc.Its normal.

Do you feel that this second pregnancy really commits you to fatherhood and postponing the rest of your life for eighteen years?

bloody hell noddy , you may really have something there .

It may be the routine of going through all of it again , the no sleep , full on getting the baby through its first few years .

1 other thing to come to mind as well while reading your question is that we will now be stuck home like hermits it is 1 thing to leave 1 child of 3 years old with the parents and go out to party but you cant put a baby - 1 year old into their responsibility as it would be unfair .

I reckon u got it noddy , its not the now , its the first few years of the after and reason im down on this pregnancy is cause i remeber what we both went thru on the first

Onthequiet--

Don't despair. Getting through that first year is much easier when you aren't being disillusioned every time. Experience beats Ignorance any day of the week. (Although the new babe will be a completely different kettle of fish from the older sibling).

Don't sell the grandparents short on managing a wee one. Girls in sheltered workshops, when supervised, can do an excellent job of feeding and and diaper changing and cuddling the babies of strangers. I'm sure that none of this babe's grandparents are feeble minded.

Smile.

Now, tote that barge and lift that bale.

Hold your dominion.

This is part of why we have only one kid. Birth to three or so was just so overwhelming that we didn't seriously think of having another -- and then when things started to calm down a bit when she (my daughter) was three or so, it was just panic-inducing to think of losing that relative calmness and going back to the insanity.

However, now that she's five and a half I see her friends playing with their little two and a half or three-year-old siblings.... We made the decision for a lot of other reasons too and we're happy with it on the balance, but it seems to me that, generally speaking, having more than one child makes for a really crazy 5-6 years or so, and then after that it's easier to have more than one, in a lot of ways.

Yes!

I feel the same way about multiple girlfriends as you do about multiple kids.