there is no way to express my apprieciation

emilywell, my understanding of this sentence is something like this: The death of a person affects the people that are left behind. The dead person is dead - that's it for him/her. But the people left behind have to cope with the loss, have to go on with their lives without this person who maybe meant a lot to them and influenced their lives.

I hope this makes sense to you.

"a man's dying is more the survivors affair than his own "
Well, I think the statement is quite the truth.