Semi-Abstinant

I still don't understand why you think that abstinence is such a good idea.
Sex is part of a relationship, in fact it is so important - like it or not - it determines if your relationship will make it or break it.

welcome back, Deler. Haven't seen ya' for a while.

In a way, I feel like I can somewhat understand where you are coming from. If you've had some experiences in the past regarding sex that you aren't too happy to look back on (maybe some regret?), it's pretty normal to think twice about this stuff. Wanting to make sure that the special person is right, that the feelings between the two of you can stand without sex.

The only part I'm not too sure about is "Sex in a relationship will mean we are no longer meant to be and is the beginning of the end."

I know you have some religious beliefs. Not to sure how you view sex in general (is it a sin? something to be ashamed to want?).

You may one day fall in love with someone, and after a period of time of blissful love without sex, you may want to make love to her.
I can't see anything wrong in that. It can be a beautiful thing.

It's all about circumstances. I do wish you happiness: if this choice does that for you, then whos to say different.

Thanks Flushd, I'm haveing a tough time connecting to the internet but it's good to be back.

I've had alot of time to look back on relationships and I wouldn't say that I regret any of them where sex was involved, each was unique and each had it's positive and negative where sex only put a solid definition to the relationship. The problem I do have and what I do regret however is everything surrounding sex, that I let it lead me more then it should have and the outlook it gave me on women in general.

I have found religion in recent months and even though I haven't been studying any particular religion to much extent I've tried my hardest to put what I know of religious beliefs into my views without being someone I'm not. I don't view all premarital sex as a sin, in fact I believe that if the situation is right that sex can be without problems. The problem I see is that when two individuals engage in premarital sex their views are often not on the same page, people don't understand what sex means any more. Sex outside of a relationship is simply that, sex with little relation and it's morality is debateable but both involved more often then not know exactly what it is. Sex in a relationship is where I have the problem, to often sex is used as a way of reinforceing the need to be together with false hopes. To me sex may call on the relationship but no matter what, without a ring it means we are going to be on our seperate ways at some point in time, maybe not right away but if we aren't meant to be together, why stay with one another even if it's good when we should be out on our own in a place to meet the one we are meant to be with.

Some day I may fall in love with someone and at some point in time after a very loveing sex free relationship I will want to make love to her, and when that day comes we will define what we mean to eachother, what we've meant to eachother and what we will mean to eachother. Two of those will be a culmination of everything to date, the last will be souly defined by one word, marriage.