(waves to devriesj)
Granted, but now your eyes are quite bloodshot.
I wish for world peace...
Granted, but now you can't even debate or argue with your spouse, et al. Everyone is jailed for the slightest outburst of anger.
I don't wanna grow up! (I'm a Toys 'R' Us kid!)
Granted, but now your children are older than you and give you orders, wielding nasty weapons to enforce their authority,
I wish the 52 bus went to Fulham.
Granted, but now ALL the buses go there, and you can get nowhere else by mass transit!
I wish I wasn's so tired!
Granted but now you cant get to sleep ever again, have fun watching infomercials.
I wish that my dog was well behaved.
Granted, he now leads you around on a leash.
I wish I could be more empathetic
Granteed, but now you share everyones feelings at once and your a bipolar and insane.
i wish i could through a party with all my favorite bands at my house.
Quote:i wish i could through a party with all my favorite bands at my house.
Your wish is granted, all your favorite bands are jam packed into your house playing, but your stuck in Atlanta in a midtown traffic jam....Good luck gettin' there, because they are only going to play for an hour.
I wish I had an Oscar Meyer Wiener....
Granted, but you have to eat it in the slaughterhouse.
I wish my garden would produce a few flowers.
Granted but everyone who comes to see them is highly alergic and the are in a comma.
i wish i could get a paint job and some new rims for my car.
"Only one wish at a time" - says the Evil Genie.
"I'll grant the paint job because it's the first one you made".
But then you get to your car and find that the "paint job" made was the work of local kids and you now have phrases like "BVHS Sucks" and "Shorty w/h" all over your car.
I wish I could travel whenever I felt like it to wherever I wanted.
Alright, granted!
But b/c of the high speed travel you hearing and sight are both gone.
I wish for a medium pet snake.
Granted, you have a charming pet snake called Phyllis. Unfortunately, as she is a medium, she keeps going into trances and manifesting ectoplasm snakes which are not so charming and scare you out of your home.
I wish I was wearing warmer clothes.
Presto! you in the thickest jacket and pants i could find that has no zippers. Unfortunately to make them warmer your also on fire.
i wish for a new plasma screen TV.
Granted. But to pay for it you have to sell your bed, your kitchen stove, the glass from your windows... and your electricity is cut off so you can't even watch it.
I wish I had a new plasma screen TV too.
Granted, but all you can get on it is Fox news.
I wish I could spend a summer traveling in England.
Granted, but then you have to spend a winter here as well.
I wish I lived in Australia.
But then you'd have to talk to those silly buggers with the crazy accents all the time ...
I would like to go scuba diving
Granted but, like me, you have to wear so many weights round your waist that you can't walk across the beach to the sea.
I wish I could live in Italy.
Granted, but because nothing runs on time there and you don't speak the language, you'd endlessly be going in circles, becoming more and more frustrated to the point that one day you crack while sipping an espresso in a cafeteria and you stab the nearest blowhard in the eye with your espresso spoon, at which point you are arrested by silly, funnily-dressed polizia who scream at you in loud, spitty Italian.
I wish I had won the lotto yesterday.
