It has occurred to me that I can't force you to read. I, on the other hand, had to sit through the excruciating thing, chomping away at a mediocre dinner. I'll finish the first kitten (out of respect to the kitten), and then I'll try another tack. So you won't have to scan past all five kittens.
Roberta wrote:
You've all forced me to do the unthinkable. I'm about to relate to you the most boring conversation I ever had the misfortunate to be a part of. It ended a friendship. No anger, rancor. Just bored it apart.
My friend was newly married. I was invited to dinner. Her husband was, IMO, on the dull side. Following was his conversation as best I remember it.
The cat had five kittens. The cat's name was Maribell. She had the five kittens. The first one was white with orange and black markings. Well, not so much black as a kind of dark brown, and the orange was really more a rust color. This kitten, what was it's name? Louise? Lucille? Laurie? It had blue eyes and one orange paw. Let me see. Was it the right front or the left front? No, the name was Louisa. One of the front paws was orange. Well, the rust color actually. Was it the right paw or the left paw?
(Me: It doesn't really matter.)
The right or the left? (Pause). Yes, it was definitely the left. (Pause) Or was it the right?
To be continued.
Wait, I think the kitten really was white with black and orange, not brown. I think that the black just looked lighter because there were some orange hairs in the black.
("You could be right," I groaned.)
Where was I? Oh, I'm pretty sure the left paw was orange. Did I say blue eyes? I'm pretty sure they were blue. Maybe green. No blue. With an orange left front paw and black and orange markings. I don't think you could call the markings spots. They weren't like polka dots. Just, you know, blotches of color. Black and orange--on a white background.
Even I run screaming into the night at the thought of the discussion of the other four kittens.
I'll have to come up with something else. Your being able to skip stuff puts boring at a disadvantage. C'est la vie. Worth a shot, though.
