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Tue 29 Nov, 2005 04:39 am
A labourer starts a new job on a big building site. On his first day, the foreman tells him that the job has certain fringe benefits.
At the end of each day, he can go to see Mavis, the rather attractive bookkeeping lady, and make love to her in the office.
At 5.30pm on Monday, he makes his way over to the office, whereupon Mavis shows him in and locks the door. She undoes his trousers and diddles him manually which, though very pleasant, was not quite what he expected.
Tuesday comes......same thing happens. Nice, but not like the real thing.
Wednesday.........just the same. He asks the other workers what THEY get up to, and is told that they have a full on, half an hour session each time.
Thursday........Apart from a slight variation in technique, things remain the same.
He decides to have a word with the foreman after Fridays manual manipulations, as he feels that, being a new boy on site, he is being discriminated against.
Taking a deep breath he goes straight over to the foreman and speaks his mind.
"You told me that I could make love to her each day, but she only goes as far as to give me a willy wobble. What's going on?"
"Ah, I should have explained" said the foreman "Everyone works a week in hand when they first start!"
I've just realised that this may not translate across the pond.
Just in case.......
"A week in hand" (UK) = "A week in arrears" (USA) ...or "in lieu?"
It's not funny if you have to explain! Snicker!
Heeven! Where have you been?
I haven't seen you for ages....I thought you'd run away with Kicky.
Has he been missing too? If so, I'll have to burn off my fingertips (no prints).
I've been busy IRL ... apparently I've discovered life outside of A2K ... whooda known! Gone are my sexual fantasies of your honorable hotness and the smouldering kickster, with a dollop of Gustaveness thrown in. I am actually getting it on with a flesh and blood personage. It makes a change from rubber and plastic gizmos. Hooray!
It just won't translate the same over here. "a week in hand" becomes a lovely pun with its double meaning.
Saying 'You don't get paid until after you work the first week' just doesn't quite have the same ring.
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