First of all, you are only 19, so your life hasn't even started yet!
Trust me, you have so much to look forward to. Go to school. You will grow and learn in more ways than you can understand right now. And somewhere along the way, you'll figure out what you want to do. A lot, and I mean, A LOT of freshman have no clue what they are going to graduate with, heck many JUNIORS don't know. College is a time to grow and expand on all the things you wanted to learn and experience. Once you get out into the "real world" and have to "grow up" you will miss the days of being almost responsibility free. Fear and anxity is probably holding you back but don't let it! Think of it this way, if you go and you hate it you can always come home. But if you never do it, you will always think that maybe you missed out on something. College was the best time of my life and I wish I could have some of the things I had then, now. Like being able to sleep in all the time. Only working part time. Doing things for the first time.
As for feeling the way you do, it's completely normal. You are at a turning point in life where you realize you are not a child anymore, but aren't quite an adult. You are unsure of where your life is going and unsure of where you'd like for it to go. Not many people your age have it "all figured out" so it isn't just you. Your life can't be going no where because it has just started. Good luck picking a college. :wink: