You First.

I'm not at all sure of the rules of ettiquet in this situation. If someone says After You or You First, I'll go first just to avoid milling around.

Like in a restaurant, if someone reaches for the check, I won't spoil their moment by fighting over it.

Usually, it's "age before beauty".

(Thus, I'm always at least the second in a row.)

Or, as Dorothy Parker said, "Pearls before swine", but Dorothy Parker wasn't exactly Amy Vanderbilt, either.

Hmm. Not too often around here would someone say "You first". In my experience one person holds the door for another, you say "Thank you", and that's the end of it.

Walter is right.

I expect a gentleman, or someone younger than me to say, "After you".

In that case, I'd say "thank you" and go first.

If the other person is a woman older than me, I most certainly wouldn't go ahead of them.

If that woman said "after you", I'd reply "oh, no ma'm, please" while indicating with my hand for her to go ahead......

I almost alway get a smile from the woman older than me. I've shown her respect by calling her m'am, and by acknowledging her right to proceed.

I think this is a VERY interesting, and pertinent subject.

I'm sure every generation has had this thought, but..."where have manners gone these days"?

I can't count the number of times people of the same age as I am or under just ram their bodies in front of mine, as if I was invisible, or drop a door in my face, when they are preceeding you.

Basically I find that ignorant and selfish, but when I see someone doing that to someone else who's older or maybe infirm......I GET SO MAD!!!

Yes, there are some really polite people out there, and I give them credit, and the world appreciates them.

Note: it only takes a second to make a good impression. Let the person senior to you go first, OR if you are a man, ALWAYS let the woman go first.

And for God's sake, turn your head to see if there is someone behind you....there's no excuse for "I didn't see you"

Feminism be damned in this case it's a sign of respect.

Oh, and if you are the one to go first.....say Thank You.

Thank you for allowing me to express my 2 cents.

Nice expounding, Chai! I agree with you on all points.

So do I. A more extreme situation of the same type occurred when I lived in Pittsburgh, where I and others often took buses rather than driving cars. In that case, I observed the rule of never sitting when a lady was standing, or even vacating my seat if there were no empty ones when women boarded the bus. The same rule applies to a feeble old man, or a man with a baby.

I agree with the whole older lady stuff and if you are of a mature age and stuff. But i think that at school, when people are all trying to get into the same room through the same door, gender and age, aside from the teacher maybe, really needs to be overlooked for the sake of some toes. If the boy onfront stops to let a girl go through then there will be lots of yelling and ramming of bodies, (not good at school). maybe for some people.......

anyhoo, i agree with the whole etiquette thing. Sometimes its so much fun too.

Every man for himself..