Wed 26 Jun, 2024 02:11 pm
I have known my coworker for over 2 years now(whom I like a lot), in recent months she would rarely call me 'my love' but not to any other coworker, which I just dismissed as a vague term of endearment.
Today, I spontaneously did something minor for her and she kind of blurted out while blushing "I love you", followed by "I appreciate you", I didn't say anything back at the time because it caught me by surprise, just gave her a big smile before going off to do some work. I have never heard her say either of those things to anyone else.
Later this evening I messaged her and asked her about it, and she said she couldn't remember what she said and it was probably just joking, and that she is definitely not interested in me...
is this normal behaviour? I am just really, really confused.
@Scarydonut,
I would be confused, too. I try to avoid confusion.
@Scarydonut,
Scarydonut wrote:
is this normal behaviour? I am just really, really confused.
Good grief. These types of questions?!
We still don't know this person's personality and motives based on a potentially biased 3 and a half paragraphs.
Take "I appreciate you" at face value and don't be an HR nightmare. The fact you "messaged her" after work hints at your potential to be stalkerish. Still be friendly with her at work. That doesn't mean it can't progress to a different kind of relationship. But you can't base anything based on her briefest reaction of gratitude to whatever minor bit of kindness you did that prompted her to speak those lines.
@tsarstepan,
wtf stalkerish? what planet are you on? we sometimes message each other. When am I supposed ask her about it? while at work, i'm far too busy doing my job in a busy workplace.
Let me ask you this, when was the last time someone said "I love you" instead of just saying "thank you" as a brief reaction of gratitude. good grief!
@Scarydonut,
Scarydonut wrote:
Let me ask you this, when was the last time someone said "I love you" instead of just saying "thank you" as a brief reaction of gratitude. good grief!
A lot more often than you claim to think. Some people are cheeky and frivolous (and I don't mean in a disrespectful manner) with the turn of phrase.
Like
I love my mocha Frappuccino.
#spoilers They don't want to LITERALLY marry their morning beverage. Maybe they were just caught off-guard by your unexpected friendly deed. And their appreciation was quite genuine and came at a much needed time while they were stressed or depressed or whatever. If you think you already know the answer to your own question? WTF would you need to write to a random group of strangers?
No one here can read her mind. Only she has that answer you're looking for.
@Scarydonut,
I think you handled it well enough so just go to work like she never even said it. She may have regretted it the instant it came out of her mouth; this gave her a chance to negate or minimize it. Just go to work like usual. It doesn't matter what she meant or how she feels - she's a co-worker - do not engage in romantics at work!! She's backing off, so you should, too.
@Mame,
Thanks, I just carried on as normal at work today. If she says stuff like that in future i'll just dismiss it as nothing. The reason it confused me is that some of us don't just toss those kinds of words around for no reason.
@Scarydonut,
No, I understand, but you can choose to take something on or not and in this case, you're not. You don't need other people's stuff to carry around with your own.
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