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Sun 21 Aug, 2005 03:38 pm
I am hoping this is only my imagination but lately something very odd is going on here.
My friend's wife of only several years has begun sending me email. Her husband and I have corresponded frequently by email over the years.
When shown a photograph of several of us to another friend that does not know them well she commented with something like "Boy, that woman really has eyes for you." The irony is my friend (her husband) was the one that took the photographs and of course he has seen this particular one.
My friend's wife said: We do crazy things around here. Jim and I send emails to each other during the day. She was not joking and there is just the one computer in the house. My friend was standing there when she said it and offered no comment.
This woman is very outgoing and gracious. I recall the first few times that I met her. I felt she was being a phony and just acting. I later discovered she had spent her working days in public relatons before she retired.
I have read her emails (several of them recently) and there is nothing seductive about them. I have not replied to any of them. I still correspond with my friend and providing it is appropriate I also include his wife's name as an addressee.
Sooner or later I know she is going to ask me why I have not emailed her. She is like that. She always must have an answer.
I certainly am not going to mention this to my friend. I suspect he already knows and I would feel very awkward. I have no idea what I should say to "Lynn" because I could be making an awful mistake and of course if I did that would be the end of friendships.
Any suggestions?
Would being honest with her be an option?
I don't know if this would work for your situation, but I would simply take her aside at the next get-together and let her know that the emails are making you a little uncomfortable.
Of course, approach it casually and with some humour, but basically just let her know you don't want to be email buddies.
She sounds like a reasonable, socially-conscious individual. I'm sure you could do this without causing any trouble. If she really is into you, she might have a little bit of hurt feelings, but it would send a clear message and nip her 'crush' or whatever in the bud.
good luck:)
No, I wouldn't chance that. I am afraid she might react badly. Say it was all my imagination and tell her husband, my friend of over forty years and that would be it.
Regardless of who is right or wrong here if the situation surfaced I just hate to think what the result would be. I think the best course of action right now is just to ignore the emails as I have been and avoid them. I only see them about once or twice a month now as it is. Hopefully she will take my lack of response favorably and just stop it!
Thank you for your reply though. I appreciate it.
Glad you figured out a solution for yourself
Quote:I have read her emails (several of them recently) and there is nothing seductive about them.
You say she's retired, and from a very social field -- couldn't it just be that she's sociable? At home, bored, writing to various people she knows?
She is sociable. I doubt she is bored. She is a social animal and knows all the nuances there is to know about personal relationships. She socializes aggressively. By this I mean she would never be content sitting around the house. She is out and around in clubs etc. She is a Rotarian for example.
4 more messages from her this morning. I think she is just doing it to entertain herself. I know she likes me. It's flattering but I have too much at stake here. I'll just continue to ignore.
cant you just put a 'block' on her e-mails?
I tend to agree with you and it is putting you in an uncomfortable situation,
4 emails in one day, crikey..and you have not replied to any at all from this woman, hmmm she should have got the message by now...I would keep doing what you are doing ignore her unless she is with her husband, if she happens to approach you on this email matter ...just say, you feel uncomfortable and explain why.....or simply just reply to her email, like you are addressing them both and forward it on to him.
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