Thu 27 Oct, 2022 11:29 am
My black excoworker been liking me since we worked together and is upset with me because i didn't let her know in a respectful way about my disinterest. For the past year they've been harrassing me, some friends and family on social media. They've also sent letters to my workplace and my apartment, about me, my fam members that also work with me and my boss. in the letters she mentioned how we were racist, rude, gaslighting her, talk crap about her, etc.
i admit, i wasnt truthful with her and avoided talking about dating even tho id reply to her convos at work. everytime she contacted me on social media, i block her, so how, at this point can you say i wasn't being honest with you? at work, some of my fam would tell me that she has anger issues and didn't like being told what to do. ive never experienced this side of her but i side with fam no matter what. i don't know for sure but i believe they are social media friends with some of my friends and my brother that they don't even know. they say that we're out to make them look like a crazy black person and that we spread hurtful rumors lol.
ive gotten law enforcement involved but no court order has been granted. the fact that they've sent mail to my personal address multiple times should tell them that this is not ok, but no. I fear she will not stop contacting my friends and fam and she will show up at my place during Holloween or something and do some dangerous things. she keep messaging saying we talk badly about her, raciallt profile her and why didn't i tell her respectfully of my disinterest, why I act like I hate her, how I am sabotagting and hurting her and who called our store sending threats.
my fam member recently told them everything they need to know, once:
that im not interested in dating or any kind of relationship with you
i never accused you of sending threats you didn't send
im not a racist to you or anyone else
i never mislead you or sent you hints and signs.
but recently she's reached out again, saying we're deniying things so that we don't have to take accountability, still thinks our actions of false police reporting, ignorance, slander is racist, etc . idk what to do at this point.
It sounds like she and her friends are stalking you and your friends and family. Is there somewhere you can make a complaint (with documentation, of course)? Maybe send her something in writing telling her you don't appreciate the harassment and to cease immediately or you'll be contacting the authorities.
The thing is, I don’t respond to her. She's had a few friends contact us. Some mail she sends to my boss who opens them and gives them to me cuz im not sure he knows what's inside.
My brother reached out recently to tell her our final thoughts and ended it there. when he blocked her, we received another letter in the mail saying “I feel like you are denying any wrong doing, I don’t recall you letting me know respectfully of your disinterest…I wish to respect your space. I apologize for the harrassment on my end.”
The police have told me that at this time, her actions are not considered at a level of stalking/harrassment.
Should I try and reach out to let her know that I DID tell her that im not interested and that i want her to stay away from me? as if it's not clear by now, but she'll send messages asking for closure and respectful communication.
What do you think is going on with her?
Maybe she has a mental illness. Who knows? But her taking it to this level is weird and abnormal. How could you know what she wanted to hear and, by not doing so, what affect that would have on her? I think she's bonkers. Can you imagine if you had ever dated her?!!
I think continuing to ignore her is the only thing you can do. Block whatever you can that you already haven't and just pretend she doesn't exist. Seriously, tune her out and never respond. She'll eventually find someone else to take issue with.
yea my cousin says she looks and acts like she doesn't have any friends or family and is probably distant from God and lonley.
I haven't replied but idk when she will ever stop contacting. wouldn't she have friends or a boyfriend by now? we met like over a year ago..