Does he like me?

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I have known this guy for less than a year.. and he seems to act normal when he is around a group of other guys (and me), but he becomes a bit shy, embarrassing and talk very softly when he is with me alone. And he also told me about his past like he smoked for many years before but quitted smoking already, and suddenly told me the jobs he had done before, and what he wants to do this year, and sometimes about his family... he told me all these personal things without me asking any... seems quite open up to me

one of the strange thing is that he never asked me out or initiated conversation with me (usually I initiate first), but he is the introvert/ type of shy guy so I am not sure.. but he would reply me with many words and could keep talking for a few hours if i text him..

recently he mentioned he wants to go to another country as a short trip in a weekend maybe with his friends, then I asked if I can join with his friends and him, then he said he's sure I would not like his friends so he would go with me alone for the trip and promised me going with me... (actually I like him but don't know what he thinks really)

do you think he likes me? or just normal friend?

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@juliaw,

Why not ask him out and find out for sure?

3 Replies

@juliaw,

Ooo, it is a new show on the website of relatives.

Hard to say if he likes or hates you really. What was his name again? I think you two are doing the naughty and going high, happy places together!

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@jespah,

Damn it! That is a great answer. You should just cut to the chaise part

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@jespah,

if I could ask him out (no courage and I think not the time yet) and find out the answer, I don't need to ask here... lol

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@juliaw,

You can do this. It's 2022 and people do it All. The. Time.

It doesn't have to be fraught with meaning. You're not proposing marriage.

It's just you saying, "Greg (or whatever his name is), do you want to get a soda?" Or substitute coffee if you prefer. Nothing alcoholic.

Go and have a lovely time. At the end, say, "This was great, can we make the next one a real date? Say, this weekend?"

And then let him say yes or no. If he says yes, then great and please name your first kid after me Wink

If he says no, then you had a lovely time having a coffee with a friend.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

2 Replies

@jespah,

haha.. it's a good idea.. it's simple.. but I think as he mentioned going to the trip, then the simpler will be just asking about the trip or maybe I find it out during the trip? maybe I will try it ask him a bit at the end of the trip then won't be awkward or embarrassing...

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@juliaw,

You know what - I, personally, would not wait to find out during the trip. What if he just wants to sleep with you (unless you are ok with that) or to me it would be more awkward and embarrassing if you go with the intention that he likes you and wants to get to know you better and instead hits on all these other women.

You would also be traveling with a man without knowing what he really feels about you. How safe will you be?

Why not simply ask him why he wants to go with you alone rather than be surprised .

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@Linkat,

sorry my english is bad, not my native language, what does it mean by "if you go with the intention that he likes you and wants to get to know you better and instead hits on all these other women."
so you mean he goes to trip with me is to use me to make other women jealous? but he doesn't and won't tell anyone he goes to trip with me...

1 Reply

@jespah,

I think the idea of asking him for a coffee doesn't mean anything, he will simply agree to have a coffee.. but may still treat me as friend only... is there any reliable way to test him? lol

1 Reply

@juliaw,

juliaw wrote:

I think the idea of asking him for a coffee doesn't mean anything, he will simply agree to have a coffee.. but may still treat me as friend only... is there any reliable way to test him? lol

Why the need to test him? Why not simply ask him?

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@juliaw,

juliaw wrote:

sorry my english is bad, not my native language, what does it mean by "if you go with the intention that he likes you and wants to get to know you better and instead hits on all these other women."
so you mean he goes to trip with me is to use me to make other women jealous? but he doesn't and won't tell anyone he goes to trip with me...

No I mean if he does simply go on the trip with you because he thinks you are a friend and then sees women he is interested in so he flirts with them, takes them out or sleeps with them. Then how would you feel?

It would be best just to ask him how he feels and why he would prefer to go on the trip with you? That way there is no misunderstandings.

There was a sitcom I used to watch called Seinfeld. One episode he had met a woman when he was a trip, he invited her to visit him at his home some time. She ended up going and then while she is sitting on his couch and all seemed she was interested in him - she gets a phone call -- it is from her soon to be husband - she was engaged. It appears she was using the situation to get a free place to stay.

Now obviously that is a sitcom so the intention is to be a funny situation - the truth behind it is if you do not ask someone's intention then it is possible someone is thinking something else.

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@jespah,

I have tried asking him out for meetup and a coffee, he prefer doing shopping.. so we will meet up next week.. then what does it mean?

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@Linkat,

I have tried asking him out for meetup and a coffee, he prefer doing shopping.. so we will meet up next week.. then what does it mean? as you think

1 Reply

@juliaw,

juliaw wrote:

I have tried asking him out for meetup and a coffee, he prefer doing shopping.. so we will meet up next week.. then what does it mean? as you think

As I am not a mind reader - I cannot possibly know.

It could be he doesn't like coffee - he could be he loves to shop or has to do some shopping. If you are wondering I would simply ask him what he means by that if you are wondering.

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@juliaw,

You will feel it if it's true or not in the long run.

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