Tue 8 Feb, 2022 06:26 am
Hello, I think I might have a problem with dating/relationships in general. I've had bad experiences with dating in my past, where the person I'm seeing appears to be super into me in the beginning, but after they've spent a decent amount of time seeing/talking to me they lose interest in me.
Now, this is going to sound silly but I've only ever dated 3 women in my entire life (I'm currently 21) including the one I'm seeing currently. The reason being is that I get super anxious whenever I'm interested in someone. I start being hypercritical of myself and my achievements which causes me to enter a state of depression.
Now I'm not normally the kind of person who experiences depression but it has gotten to the point, at times, where it affects my ability to concentrate on tasks or even eat. I recognize that my feelings of anxiousness are stupid and I shouldn't engage with them but I can't seem to shake it off. The only thing that seems to help is to not talk or date anyone at all. Yet I don't think I can live that way forever.
I don't entirely know what I'm anxious about or what I should do to fix it. I already live a decent and healthy life and I have hobbies and friends outside of everything else yet I still feel the way I do.
If anyone has any ideas I'd love to hear them!
If anxiety and depression are affecting your ability to function, then it's time to get help.
Do you think it's a good idea to go even if I only deal with this sort of thing when I'm "seeing" someone?
I do, because I think it would be a good idea for your unconscious mind to stop associating the two.
You're gonna be okay.
Thank you so much for the advice. I'll try and see if I can contact one through my healthcare.
I think you have some kind of barrier in your head and you start looking for a catch in everything that happens. You need help, of course, but the most important thing is to sort yourself out and add confidence. I, too, was unsure of myself for a long time and started going out a lot and looking for fling casual dating on online sites in order to get divorced without commitment. Everyone has their own ways of doing this. Think about what you need.