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Did I do the right thing and should I move on from him?

 
 
Reply Tue 21 Dec, 2021 04:08 am
This guy messaged me first quite a few times before I had responded on Instagram. I then realised it was a few months and I hadn’t responded so I messaged him. We spoke for probably a whole month before the meeting. He has offered breakfast/study dates before too. We ended up going out for dinner. Had very good chats, seems like a really lovely guy and nothing sexual.

Some cute messages to each other, like him sending me photos of what he does for work and him telling me that he often thinks about me. He told me he was a bit nervous before picking me up. He picked me up from my house and before he got to mine, he texted me saying would I like him to meet my parents or just pick me up. He paid for dinner and it went really well in terms of chats, felt like a really caring and respectful guy, talked about family and all those nice things. One thing is that he takes great interest in my life and wants to make things easier for me (or so it feels at times), for example wanting to help me out with studying etc.

He dropped me home and did not indicate anything about going back to his which was good. He asked if I would like to do this again and I said yes. When we got back to my house to drop me home, my mother was just coming home and he waited and said hello to her. He then said she was lovely. I could tell he wanted to kiss as he sort of just kept looking at me, I said something and then we kissed. He messaged me a few hours later thanking me, kept in on and off-contact for the week, he told me he was tired but good. He asked about my plans for the weekend and I did the same, he is very busy and works in the medical field. He hasn’t mentioned anything about catching up again. He asked about a job interview over the weekend and I didn’t respond till about 5 days later.

In one of our messages, I sort of implied that I wasn’t sure when I would be seeing him next and he sent a sweet message saying he hopes to get to know me better and see where things go. That he was busy but should have more time once exams are finished and that he does want to see me again. I told him I supported him and that I don’t expect him to keep in contact.

He initiates a lot and has initiated predominately. He’ll message, we’ll talk for a bit and then maybe I won’t respond if it doesn’t require a response and then he’ll send a follow-up message asking about something. He asked about studying together. I suggested we should go to the beach/study together. He asked me a few other questions, asking where the apartment is etc as I’m probably buying one soon. He’s currently in quarantine and we’ve been messaging a fair bit, him following up if I don’t respond etc. He told me about some job offers he took, asking what we want to do when we catch up. Today, he asked me about what I’m looking for (to clarify) as he has to move away which is about 2 hours away with a sad face. Told him I want to see where things go and that I do like him, he agreed to talk in person. Then asked if I’m looking for someone casual at all, perhaps asked me this as a while back when we were talking, I said I probably didn’t have the capacity for anything serious but would be open to it. He questioned at the time and said ‘I thought you were looking for something serious?’ I said not pursuing something casual but the same for a relationship. He agreed that we should talk about this and see how/where things go. I told him I liked him as I feel like I've poorly expressed it.

The other night I was frustrated and sent him a text saying that he had a chance to see me after my exams but nothing happened. That I would always be understanding of how busy he is but don’t f*** me around. That if he has no intentions of seeing me, then stop with the teasing. I sort of accused him that he would be out of quarantine by now. He replied a bit abruptly saying that he’s only out today and that he was going to ask to see me once he was out but didn’t want to double message and seem needy (when I look back at my messages, he’s doubled messaged a lot). He said I was slightly harsh about the quarantine comment. I apologised and stated I didn't know exactly when it finished for him. I finally asked him if he’ll be free soon to have a chat about where things are going and he said he’ll be free and that we should talk. He took a while to respond to that message. I suggested I just come over to his. Random and maybe doesn’t mean anything, but I’ve noticed he’s started using ‘we’ or ‘us’ more. I told him I've missed him since I last saw him but he didn't say anything to that comment. He also didn't return the 'I like you' when he asked what I'm looking for. I simply asked him if he’ll be free as I think it would be good to have the talk/clear the air and he just said that he will be and that we should talk. I said to him that I understand about him going back into life after quarantine and willing to give him space but let me know when suits as I didn’t think doing this over text is the right way. He only liked some last message when I apologised for being so late. He never responded. Then 2 days later, I basically tell him that I cannot shake my concerns and I’m worried his communication is going to hinder something serious. I told him I didn’t see the reason to participate in this any further really and wished him the best about moving away and unfollowed him. I told him that it dispirited me when I opened up about how I felt and didn’t get anything in return and that if he had been sending me the messages I have sent, I would drop everything and see him but I don’t think he is. I sent that last Thursday and still haven't heard anything.

**TL;DR** guy I’ve been talking to for almost 5 months straight, I haven’t seen him since late August and been frustrated. He seems to be into me but unsure of his intentions. He asked me again recently what I’m looking for and is moving 2 hours away.
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Type: Question • Score: 5 • Views: 1,739 • Replies: 5
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jespah
 
  2  
Reply Tue 21 Dec, 2021 06:01 am
@largefields94,
Why the hell should he want to see you, when you essentially yelled at him out of the blue?
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Tue 21 Dec, 2021 08:12 pm
@largefields94,
Give it up.
0 Replies
 
cherrie
 
  1  
Reply Tue 21 Dec, 2021 08:51 pm
Hasn't this all been said before under a different user name?

It all sounds very familiar.
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Tue 21 Dec, 2021 09:14 pm
@cherrie,
It's the conveyor belt of life, cherrie!
cherrie
 
  1  
Reply Tue 21 Dec, 2021 10:09 pm
@Mame,
This conveyor belt must be on a loop then.
0 Replies
 
 

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