Vaccination issue: Would I be wrong?

You don't know why your wife feels that way - have you asked? She could be quiet simply because she does not look forward to the confrontation with her family - it might not be because she does not agree just not looking forward to the conversation.

I'm a firm believer of this mantra. I have very few "rules" but I do expect people to follow what I want in my own home. If a mask is a requirement in your home, so be it. Or meet somewhere else.

I don't see this as a confrontation. I see it as what we are requiring in OUR house. Back when the pandemic was really in full swing they weren't allowed in may stores or businesses without a mask so why is our home any different. And again, I'm not saying they can't come, they can, I'm just saying that given your stance on vaccinations we would prefer you wear a mask.

I mean that if they've already contracted Covid, they have natural immunity. Natural immunity is by far superior to what they would get from the experimental injection. The CDC has been asked to explain their rejection of all the studies that show natural immunity to be far superior to the experimental injections.

Check this out:

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As discussed in Section IV below, the sole study cited in your response involved a convoluted, highly confounded, small retrospective case control study of a few hundred individuals from Kentucky that the CDC itself published on August 13, 2021, months after being served with the instant Petition and directly before finally responding to same (the “Kentucky
study”).

This study is irrelevant as to whether it is appropriate for the CDC to lift restrictions on the naturally immune because it did not compare naturally immune individuals with vaccinated individuals. Instead, it compared the naturally immune to the naturally immune with subsequent vaccination. Putting aside the possibility that vaccinating the naturally immune may improve their immunity, if the CDC lifts restrictions on those with only vaccine-induced immunity, it is simply authoritarian to not lift restrictions on those with only natural immunity since it is at least as good, and in fact superior, to vaccine immunity.
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https://www.icandecide.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Reply-to-CDC-Re-Natural-Immunity-v-Vaccine-Immunity.pdf

We all have those friends who when you go to their house they ask you to take your shoes off at the door. Personally I would not go visit anyone where I had to undress in some way in order to go in their house. So I choose to stay away from their places if I don't have to go. We don't complain about taking off shoes to go in so why would we complain because someone asks us to wear a mask given they know the person is not vaccinated? Maybe I just don't see it as that big of a deal. The only rule I have when you get in my truck is to not smoke. I'm not saying you can't smoke, but just not in my truck. And do not get in my truck and start hitting buttons or readjusting your seat. You're not going to be in it that long. My passenger seat is set for my wife just like her passenger seat is set for me. When I get in her car I can tell if someone moved the seat. I had a guy get into my SUV some time ago and we were going back to our church which was less than half a mile away. He immediately started adjusting the seat and turning on the seat warmer. 1/2 a mile isn't going to toast your buns that much. But as for my home, we are still dealing with this pandemic even though numbers are on the decline. and now the majority of those infected with the virus are primarily the unvaccinated.

And no, I do want want to take the chance of taking that virus to either of our parent's home. Yes, they are vaccinated too but with age comes other ailments. Their immune system may already be compromised by other factors, such as in the case of Colin Powell, but why take that chance?

YOU DON'T - but your wife might. It is her perception - just trying to give you a reason she might have appeared hesitate -

Again YOU SEE IT - but she is part of this household so right or wrong she should have as much say as you.

And I fully support your decision - I have nothing against it - but you need to remember your wife as well. As she did not say anything against it but hesitated I read into it - that she supports this decision, but is worried about the potential backlash from her family. Her not saying anything against it - I get the feeling she agrees, but is a bit scared of dealing with her family (just my read) - maybe you asking her and being kind towards her thoughts might just might help her a bit to know you support her and sympathize - that is not saying you do not follow about them wearing a mask at all - this is just being caring towards your wife where it may not be as easy for her to just lay down the law.

And how would you know?

Even those who have had covid have caught it again (now granted the % is lower for that) - but if Barry is not comfortable with it - it is his house (and his wife) so they should be able to put whatever rules they want.

This to me is a perfect example of an idiotic request (as how hard is it to re-adjust your seat back where you like it). However, it is his car so his rules - so even if you feel a request is idiotic if you go into someone else's home or their car you follow their requests otherwise you get out.

So for those feeling asking someone to wear a mask is idiotic (which I do not) then you do have the choice of not coming in. I agree it is a small request - same as not moving the car seat - it is a small request so I do not see the reason why one would not appease.

Funny thing:

One of my step-sons just came by and when he walked in the house he had his mask on but it was looped under his chin. I sent out a group text to my wife and the 3 kids and this is what I said:

"We have been lax on some things these days. The virus is still a threat. We have masks and sanitizer on the entertainment center in the living room. If you have not gotten the vaccine we are asking that when you come by you keep your mask on. We're not saying you can't come by but just keep your mask on. We urge those who have not gotten the shot to please do so. All of your grandparents are getting up in age and with whatever ailments they have this virus is enough to take them out. Please think about their safety. And when around them still wear your masks. Kim, (to my daughter but not her real name) with your roommate not being vaccinated I'm now asking her to wear a mask when / if she comes by. Please, if you are not vaccinated I / we urge you to get your shot. It is saving lives."

My wife gets the text then comes into the bedroom to tell me that she wish I would just let her handle some things. I told her that her son had just come by and he had his mask under his chin. She said "well he had it on!" Woman are you serious! Looping the mask over your ears then draping it under your chins is as about as much protection as tying it on your arm or looping it through your belt. People kill me wearing a mask under their chin or worst yet, putting it on their face but under their nose. How do they test for covid? They stick a swab way up your nose so protecting your mouth is pointless if you're not going to cover your nose at the same time.

My question - why did you not just ask him at the time to pull his mask over his face?

The text (although not completely terrible) could irk many people - especially those that have been respecting your policy. I'd rather talk to the one or two people that are not doing as you request.

I think you make things more difficult than they need to be.

I think you're being very reasonable.

I wouldn't let anyone in my home who wasn't vaccinated, mask or not.

Trust me, I am caring towards her despite my posting history. I want her to be safe and healthy too. And I did discuss it with her prior to mentioning it to the kids. She is fully vaccinated but I can't see going through the effort to get the shot then say to those who your birth "if you don't want to get the shot it's cool, come on by anytime you like. Oh, and when you go see your grandparents make sure you give them a big hug and kiss before you leave." Again, I'm not saying they can't come by. I'm just saying that they need to keep their masks on inside our house. We are eating Thanksgiving dinner with my parent's this year and the majority of us will not be wearing masks simply because we're all vaccinated. However, if my step-sons come they will be required to wear one. They all gave my daughter's roommate hell a few weeks ago when she was at my parent's house and my brother in law asked her if she had the shot. When she said no everyone literally turned on her. My dad is 82 years old. My mom is in her upper 70s. She had been in the house for a while and even had dinner with us. No, I didn't know she wasn't vaccinated either. But when asked to put on a mask she had no problem complying. Again, no one is mandating that you have to go and get the shot. That's your personal choice. But it's also everyone else's choice to require you to wear a mask if you're in their house.

I have no issue with what you are doing - just maybe you are not always the most thought out in your approach.

I trust the science, which I've just shown you.

If you don't want to acknowledge--or even look at--the facts of the matter, you're going to continue asking how I know that natural immunity is far superior to the experimental injections that do not prevent infection or transmission. The studies have been done, and conclusions have been reached.

Is there any particular reason you don't wish to acknowledge the real science on the issue of natural immunity? Have another look.

https://www.icandecide.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Reply-to-CDC-Re-Natural-Immunity-v-Vaccine-Immunity.pdf

And even when I am a passenger in my wife's car I still don't just start adjusting seats, pushing buttons, or adjusting her mirrors so I can see myself. The most I'll do is turn on the seat warmer. And she's the same way in my SUV. Her car her rules, my car my rules. And I don't see why she would have a problem with her sons having to wear a mask. If we don't trust strangers in our home who say they are vaccinated but still require them to wear one then why are her sons any more special and we know they are not vaccinated?

"My question - why did you not just ask him at the time to pull his mask over his face?"

I did.

No I mean how would Barry know if one of his sons-in law had immunity?

The average Joe does not go out and get tested for immunity.

It doesn't appear she has an issue either - it seems she just does not like how you handle it.

I think this is more a discussion between the two of you - as we cannot read her mind. I inferred what I thought she might be thinking from what you said her reaction was.

But if you question that she has an issue with her sons wearing a mask why don't you talk with her to see and discuss how it should best be handled. Clear communication would resolve all of this.

And did he comply? If so, then why was the text necessary?

The issue here is about family relationships. Vaccination isn't really the issue here.

You are responsible for your own behavior. You don't control the behavior of any other adult in your family. Take responsibility for your own behavior.

Read the text you sent, and change "vaccination" for "circumcision" or "heterosexual" or any other controversial issue that you would take issue with... how would you react if your kids were treated differently in someone's house because they weren't circumcised or were in a same-sex relationship.

You may be right on this issue (I certainly think you are). But it doesnt matter.

You are going to have to choose between your beliefs, and the real risk of damaging family relationships. You actions have consequences, and you are to take responsibility for them.