i am pregnant and need help!

good luck in making your decision. we support you whatever you decide.

did they say what was on your ovary?

becca--

Tough decision.

We're here if you need to vent.

Hang in there.

i have a cyst on my ovary, thank you all for the support! i am going for some counseling today....

i sorta suspected that. You're lucky you found out so early. My sister's grew very large before it was discovered.
We'll be here to monitor your recuperation. Hang in there becca!

i know that this is not an easy subject and that lots of people feel very strongly about it , but i have to ask..........anyone here ever had an abortion and how do you feel about it and the procedure? i never thought that i would consider this as an option but in my current situation i am.........please give advice.......

becca i only have advice on ovarian cysts since i have had them since i was 19 (ten years). for me they keep recurring over and over. if you need any advice on that, let me know. as far as abortion, i have no advice. fortunately never been there. i do wish you the best of luck deciding, i can't be easy. however, i personally support any decision you make. good luck!

Are you pregnant and you also have a cyst?

I have no first hand experience with abortion.

I know of two women who aborted untimely pregnancies. They have no regrets.

A third woman who chose abortion nearly 40 years ago still likes to play, "What If". From my point of view her focus seems to be me-me-me-me-me rather than on the unborn child.

Obviously this pregnancy was not planned. Will it cause complications in your physical or mental health?

yes i do have a cyst also, as for complications in physical or mental health, i have had some problems with blood pressure and when i had my son 11 years ago they ripped my uterus ( it was a very hard delivery) some of my biggest concerns are my husband and i are worried about our age and finacial, my son is almost 12 years old and we don' t know if we want to start over, we made this decision a year ago ( when i had tubes tied) my son had health problems when he was born and he is fine now but he still has pretty bad asthma, i just don't know if i can do this again but i feel guilty for feeling that way........

becca--

In this day and age children are optional. You aren't an impulsive teenager trying to get rid of the product of unsafe sex, you are a mature woman who made a decision to limit her family--for excellent reasons.

Now you are faced with an unplanned, unwanted pregnancy.

How old are you now?

32 years old

my husband is 40, i know people start familys at our age all the time but i guess since we had our son so young this seems to old for us, i think mostly because there would be such an age gap between the children and it sorta would be like starting over for us. my sister in law had a baby at 35 and i was thrilled for her, it was her first and only and i never thought about her age but i guess since i did this almost 12 years ago, that is just a long time to wait to have another.......

becca,

i understand your guilt and it is going to be hard to get over if you choose abortion. however, like noddy said, it isn't like you are using it as a form of birth control. you made the most extreme move you could last year to not be able to have children anymore, and yet for some strange reason it didn't work (I personally would be questioning the person who did your tubal ligation to see if there is any other reason than chance it happened). You have to weigh all of your options. you had a hard delivery with complications for you child at 20, it may or may not be worse at 32.

i personally am all about the finances (being a money manager professionally i can't help it!). mr. d and i haven't had kids because we literally can't afford it yet. i take extreme measures (not as extreme as you obviously since we want kids in the future) to not get pregnant.

me personally, i would think about the baby's health prognosis (and yours for that matter) if you carry to full term. that is probably most important at this point. it may be good, it may be bad, but please, please don't beat yourself up for this, you took every precaution not to be here.

and again, i am all too familiar with cysts if you need to know anything about them

good luck.

becca--

You and your husband are old enough that having an unplanned child could complicate retirement plans.

I'm sure there are people who will tell you that this baby was meant to be born--but these people are not the ones who will be rearranging their lives for this baby.

Facts, facts, facts--and you still have a hard choice.

Becca, abortion is different for every woman. Some regret it, some don't. I know women who never thought twice about their decision and others who lamented over a pregnancy. You need to think about the future of the child, and yourself. Can you, will you, provide a loving home for this child for at least 18 years?

If you decide you can't provide that future, then you know what your decision is. If you decide that abortion is the answer, who is any one else to judge that it wasn't the right decision for you?

that is one of the issues that bothers me the most, we are trying to save for my son to go to college and finacial reasons to not have this child are there, i want to give my son i have a good life and things that he needs, it would be hard if i had another child, but i look at my son and i feel guilty for wanting the abortion, my son has been the blessing of my life and i love him more than anything. i just am not ready to have this child. i just hope that i have no regrets, i wish i had more time to just be sure but i don't, i can not do this if i am much further along because i know that it would bother me more if i did it later, i have made the appt. even though i am sad, i do think that it is best.

thank you all for the support, it means alot to me.

becca--

Glad we could help. We're here if you need us.