Should I dismiss this guy?

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I met this guy 6 months ago in Tahoe and he has had a lasting effect in my memory. He's in SF and I'm in Phoenix. He bought me a beer and we hit it off. I just emailed him to let him know that I will be in his neck of the woods, and he told me he had a girlfriend but he was willing to sneak out to meet me. Not only am I hearbroken, but I'm not very pleased that he would cheat on her. I have been cheated on before, so this is very sensitive to me. Anyway, please tell me what you think of this email thread. Should I dismiss him altogether?

Edit (Moderator): e-mail address removed wrote:
Date: Thu, 7 Jul 2005 11:42:55 -0700
To: [email protected]
From: Edit (Moderator): e-mail address removed
Subject: Re: hello stranger!

I'm out of town early next week. Not sure if I'll be back on Tuesday or wednesday.
I do have a girlfriend and she is the jealous type! It is going to be difficult for me to sneak out. I know that sounds a bit naughty but we've had our difficulties lately and there's no way she'd be okay with me showing you around on my own. Sorry about the lodging situation. I will contact you early next week to give you an update as to my situation. I hope this doesn't mess up your trip too much. I'm sure you have plenty to keep you busy anyway.
What is your cell phone number? and what happened to have caused this sudden trip? Your situation has obviously taken a little turn. I'm dying to know? Don't forget your cell number!

Stuart

I will be here next Monday and leaving the following Saturday. At the risk of sounding presumptuous, I was wondering if you had an extra room I can stay at. I won't inconvenience you, I just want to soak in the sites and can do some of my own touring around. I would also like to get to know you better too. The only thing I have going is an appointment on Tuesday during the day...maybe we can hang out in the evenings after you get off of work?

Edit (Moderator): e-mail address removed wrote:

Lori...Lori...Lori???
Of course I remember you. Short redhead. Met you in Seattle. Right?
WOW. Tahoe seems so long ago. And yes, I'd love to play our guide and all.
When are you going to be here? I have a couple of short trips coming up.
Let me know when you're planning to visit?

Stuart

>Hey Stuart,
>
>Do you remember me? you said you were going to be my "tour guide" if
>I came to San Francisco? I'm coming out that way and I don't have
>any friends so I was wondering if you could also be my hotel as
>well. Smile

Would love for you to show me around. That is, unless, you
>already have a girlfriend! Sad

>
>Lori
>
>
>
>
>__________________________________________________
>Do You Yahoo!?
>Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
>http://mail.yahoo.com

--
SM

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 658 • Replies: 9

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Interesting interpretation you've got of his email.

I think he's telling you something a bit different.

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First: Delete the guy's name and email address and your email address. I don't think this guy would appreciate the fact that you have just posted a private email with all identifying info on the internet.

Second: He was honest with you; he told you that he has a girlfriend; he told you that she was the jealous type; but he would nevertheless give you a guided tour of S.F.

He didn't say that he wanted to cheat on his girlfriend with you.

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ilech88 I would take Debra_law's advice and delete the private aspects of the email - including the names. I got a shock when I realised I was reading the email with all private details attached.

Otherwise - you guys can (or should) be good friends but that's it. I am thinking that by the way you said "sneaking" it sounded like he may have been honest and told you he had a girlfriend but he still had some DISHONEST intentions in mind, whether now or in the long term.

Then again, it may have been an incorrect interpretation?

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When I read it, it seemed like he was trying to blow her off when he realized she was actually following up on an invite that he never meant.

He's back-pedalling away from her. Fast.

<I feel so sorry for this guy>

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Listen, if you want to take a chance on getting spam yourself from putting your email in a forum, that's fine, but take the fellow's personal name and email address out of your post. Posting his information and his email is an invasion of his privacy.

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I've sent a note to the helpdesk asking that the guy's email info be removed. I don't know if they can do that, but it was worth asking.

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Thanks to the helpdesk!

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To answer your question, it depends on what you were expecting from him? It sounds like he's willing to spend time with you, but circumstances require that you get somewhere else to sleep. He's being straight forward and honest. Perhaps more so now than he was six months ago. He told you to look him up if you were ever in the city and you did and he wants to get together but he can't commit a bunch of time.

I don't see the problem.

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Just go and be firends, see where it leads. If he tries it on and you dont want him to cheat, just make himchoose between you and his girlfriend. If he chooses you make sure he breaks it off with his girlfriend before you take it any further.

Good Luck!!!!!!!!

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Should I dismiss this guy?

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