squinney wrote:NO!
Seriously, she can understand no. She is putting together what is okay / not okay at this time. She is seeing what she can / cannot do. Not a testing, like teens will do, but more of an exploration. .
I will have to print that out and post it on the wall because I need to remember that. It feels ( even though the better part of me KNOWS it isnt true ) that she is just testing me and that is frustrating.
squinney wrote:
Try thinking like a 14 month old. .
HA! I think I can handle that. Pick my nose, cry , and sit in peoples lap.
squinney wrote:
There's these little things on the walls with holes in them. I wonder what they do or where the holes go to. I mean, I see a hole on the ground and there are little bugs that come out. Maybe this is where little bugs live... I'll stick something in there to see if they will come out to play.
Crimeny! That got a major reaction outta Mom!!! What the heck is she jumpin around like that for? Her arms went swingin and she came running towards me. OMG! She looked really funny! I wonder if I can get her to do that again. Let's see... What did I do to make her dance like that? Oh, yeah, I remember...
See? Bean doesn't know what all this is about. She knows she explores something and you react. Sometimes your reaction might make her want you to do that again.
She understands when you say "NO" you want her to not do something, but gosh, that dance was really funny. Who could resist? She understands that she doesn't want you to yell, or say she can't do something, but she's really just trying to figure out her world. (We all know this is Beans world and she's just allowing us to live in it, right?)
Basically, she's exploring. She doesn't know about gravity, or that glass will break or that the holes in the walls will "bite" if you stick something in them. But, she's learning.
Maybe you could switch from "No" to "hurt."
When she goes to pick up something fragile, tell her "This will break. We don't want to hurt it." When she is getting ready to do something that may hurt her, say "That might hurt you. We don't want you to get hurt."
Kinda depends on the language you already use with her. If you say booboo instead of hurt, and she understands booboo, then use the word she knows.
That is a good idea also.
I have to watch myself with her because I have a tendency to over explain like she is Einstein or something.. haha
but short simple statements will save MY sanity.
And that funny arm waving dance?
Oh yeah.. i do that when I see her getting close to something that may hurt her.
Mr Wolf and I were talking about this last night adn his friend jon had said something to him that made him think about Bean.
Jon is taking his dog to training classes and one of the suggestions for correcting behaviors was not to use your voice. AT ALL! But to just physically correct the dog, and if verbalization was necessary, use a monotone voice. Pick the dog up and move him from what ever it is he is doing, or take away the offending object ...etc ,, and let that be the extent of your correction.
Simply because, dogs live for thier owners reactions. No reaction creates no memory of the behavior and you dont accidently get your dog excited about chewing up your shoes to the point where it becomes a game simply because of your reaction.
Well, remove the DOG and use that idea for children.
I think it would create the same outcome. Kids love to entertain thier parents and love to attract thier attention. If , when she is doing something wrong, i just silently pull her away and take her to play, or to the other side of the room, with out making a big deal about what ever it was she was doing, wouldnt that work in the same way?
No reaction from mommy, she just takes me to do something else.. ?
Hmm...
