Going on vacation and I'm going to get married

Hmm. Not exactly the same, but my husband's sister was married in Italy (where she lives, now with her husband) and there was a reception there and then a larger reception here in my in-laws' apartment.

One thing that I found odd about having the reception that separate from the ceremony (and maybe I was the only one who felt this way, I dunno) was that the reception was more like a cocktail party than a wedding, particularly since everyone just wore work clothes so the bride wasn't even in a gown. So there was a disconnect for me, but perhaps that's just me.

Keep in mind, though, this was a small reception (but still larger than what they'd had in Italy) and didn't take place in a hired hall or house of worship. It might have felt different if it was more like what in my family is a standard wedding, with flowers, a wedding gown, a cake, etc. Standing around and eating olives and cheese in my in-laws' apartment was very different.

Just plan the vacation..send out the cards on the way..have a big darn party when you get back, and screw em all.

Obviously havent changed my ideas for you.

I'm with Quinn. After all, this is about you and your future husband and things should go the way you want them to go ;-) This must be so exciting for you and I'm jealous :-D

Wow, Sugar, you're stressing over this. Ima hafta go with Q and Gezzy. You sound as if you need a vacation.

The best wedding reception I went to was last fall. The couple got married at City Hall, with 2 people they met in the hall as witnesses. On their way to the airport for their honeymoon, they dropped invitations to the reception in the mail - they basically said 'hey great news, we're married, come help us celebrate'. It was fabulous. They had a stress-free wedding and honeymoon - the reception was ready to go when they got back - food stations and a shooter bar and very cool music. With 2 weeks notice, the parents all had time to recover, no one freaked over what they were going to wear - it was amazing. Oh yeah, everyone was invited to bring desserts if they wanted. So there were some brownies and butter tarts and cookies and little unassuming treats like that to go with the wedding cake - which was a giant cheesecake the sister of the groom made.

Beth
That sounds awsome :-D

Just reflecting - the next two favourite weddings/receptions were also non-standard. My best friend comes from a very large family - she is one of 7 and it gets worse from there. She and her groom (my best friend in grade 2) decided to have their wedding in a tiny chapel so they could only have parents, grandparents and siblings (with spouses, no kids) at their wedding. They each invited one guest (with no spouses/dates). I was one of the guests.

After the ceremony there was a tea party at her parents home (ok so it's actually more like an estate) - tea, cookies, and then a champagne toast with cake - everyone was invited to that. The bride and groom stayed for 2 hours and then left on their honeymoon. I liked that one because it wasn't a waste of a whole day waiting for photos and participating in multiple receiving lines.

The other fab one was a very chi-chi Reform Jewish wedding - done in a hotel - another champagne reception after an immediate family only ceremony (plus the infamous 1 guest - I represented the groom's entire hometown). A few hours of extraordinary food and champagne and we were free, free, free.

The wedding couples in both of these two do's also seemed remarkably stress-free.

If you are going to get married in a foreign country you may need a marriage visa of some kind. I did when I married a Colombian in Colombia. Of course both you being US citizens perhaps that doesn't apply.

It does apply, but that should not be difficult to get, even at a U.S. embassy I believe. I have a bad experience with the attempt to make a small wedding. Well, my sister's wedding that is. She wanted just the closest family to be at the reception and then go to dinner. But knowing our family we knew some might be offended. My mom thus had a garden party for the family few days before the actual wedding. It was nice, but much work. Then we realized the friends may be disappointed or disgruntled and threw another garden party, few days after the wedding. About 70 people showed up. Also much work. Thus, despite the fact that the wedding itself was small and only 10 of us went to dinner, we could not escape the parties we wanted to. All in all, it would have been much simpler to make one large wedding and have it done with! But if you're going abroad, it should be easier, I suppose.