Grammar and syntax question

Reply Tue 7 Apr, 2020 02:04 pm
Is one of these sentences more correct than the other? Are they both poorly written?

Version 1: We learn of a traumatic event that happened on February 13th, the bombing of a shelter in Baghdad, where her parents died.

Version 2: We learn of a traumatic event, the bombing of a shelter on February 13th, where her parents died.

Both sound strange to me, and I'm not sure if it's grammatically correct to place the phrase that begins with "the bombing..." after the "February 13th..." since the phrase is technically describing the event, not the date! Also, what is this kind of phrase called in grammar? Is it an adjectival phrase?

Thanks for any of your advice!

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Reply Wed 15 Apr, 2020 02:48 am
Both sentences are grammatically correct. So don`t worry Smile
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david lyga
Reply Sun 28 Jun, 2020 11:20 am
My choice is as follows:

We learn of a traumatic event which happened on February 13th: the bombing of a shelter in Baghdad, where her parents died.
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