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Sun 8 Dec, 2019 12:43 pm
This will be quite lengthy so please bear with me.
A little background information. I am 22 and a student.
Two years ago I met this girl in one of my summer classes and we instantly clicked. At the time she had taken a break with her boyfriend we talked and got to know each other. I do not care for girls for the simple reason that they can't hold an interesting conversation or are able to match me at an intellectual level, so when I met her I was blown away because she was my match. I obtained a great level of feelings for her, and I felt the feeling was mutual. But ultimately she got back with her boyfriend and that was the end of that. It hurt, because i met this rare find and i was going to be unable to pursue it. Time went by and i dated, but i settled with women that i knew from the start i would never care for. That is my dating life. Fast forward to present time, she came back into my life, each of us a bit older. She is no longer with her boyfriend and I can say with certainty they won't get back together. We rekindled our friendship. To expand on our personalities, I will be graduating in May as an engineer and she will graduate as well but proceed to medical school. We are both extremely driven, ambitious, and smart. She also is not afraid to call out anyone out on their bullshit which i find extremely attractive due to my firm personality. Last night we went out for drinks and had a great time. This time i was determined to know where we stand and i would find out at all costs. After a few rounds of drinks (6) the deep conversations came up. To summarize that conversation, she basically told me that i am indeed her match. That i am a rare find and that if we were both 35 and ready to settle she would choose me 100x without hesitation but the fact is that we're 22 she she is not ready to settle down. (her last relationship was a long term one) I understand 100%. If it were up to me i would want to take it EXTREMELY slow, become the best of friends, and grow that into a relationship. I am afraid to miss out on her and what is has the potential for. By the end of the night i thanked her for letting us have that conversation and i haven't talked to her since.
As stupid as it sounds and people say this **** all the time, but i truly believe i will never find another woman like her. I am scared, i don't want to go back to a bland and unfulfilling love life, because that is exactly what will happen if i let her get away. I REFUSE, this is a once and a lifetime person and I will do anything i can to make it happen. I plan on distance myself to be able to think, i want to think with logic and not emotion. But i don't know what to do. I would not be able to stick around and allow my brain to lead itself on. How do i go on about this? I don't want to let her go. I need advice please.
@swow52,
So the last time the 2 of you spoke you were both very drunk.
Don’t you think it would be a better idea to have this conversation when you are both sober?
Also I don’t understand what you mean when you say you were going going to find out “at any cost”. What did you think the cost would be to talk to someone?
She’s an equal part of this, so you need to agree to sit down and discuss when you aren’t drunk.