I’m a 17 y/o girl and my 19 y/o brother hits and threatens me.

My big brother, I think he has a mental illness.
He has graduated from high school last year and has nothing to do other than working out at home to get taller.
He doesn’t get out of home so i’m stuck with him.

Last year he hit my mother twice saying she disrespected him. My mom thinks it was her and Dad’s fault he turned out this way, says dad was very rough on him when he was small and he learned to be abusive from him.
And so She didn’t tell dad he had ever hit her.

From when i was young he was always hitting me. He would hit me if i looked at him or talked back after he insulted me for no reason. So I normally began avoiding him. Because if i did anything that he didn’t like he wouldn’t histate to strike.

That was all before i had puberty, after that he began being more gentle ( he still hit me but most of it was shoving and threatening ). And I was happier than ever. Although I still had to avoid him. Because sometimes he’ll snap.

This year, after reaching whatever height he was proud of but still not enough, said that his past self is dead and no one is allowed to talk about it.
And he became very sensitive.

- if he sees someone taller than him at the mall he wouldn’t shut up and leave mom alone, he even tells her he’ll kill himself if he doesn’t become taller than that person.
- Makes mom tell him she would pray that he reaches that height. Every. Day.
- Insults mom and threatens and spits at her if she said something that he didn’t like.
- No one is allowed to refer to him as short or do anything that is disrespectful to him even though he does it all the time.
-
This whole year it has just been the same thing again and again.

He hits me, mom hits him, he apologizes to me while smirking just so he can sleep peacefully, and I don’t accept it saying what the point if he’s going to hit me again he’ll begin threatening to hit me if I don’t accept his apology.
And i do just so he leaves me alone. But he doesn’t, he hits me again and again and again.

He once hit my cat refal to make my cry, last week he snatched my brand new laptop that Dad bought for me and slammed it on the floor after hitting me. The day before yesterday he punched me twice it still hurts now, and before an hour he threatened to kill me irl in front of my parents because i killed him in a game with my little brother. My mother as usual scolded him and hit him but to no avail.

Even after i told him that i only killed him in the game because he hit me and i was going to lose all my stuff he says, “ how dare you kill me, me, 8’7 tall and you dare? I’ll make you cry today, just wait” it sounds so cheesy in English but that was it. I’m arabian.

He doesn’t histate to hit me anymore, he throws himself at me just to hit me, if I didn’t say good morning to him or if i said it and he didn’t hear me VOILA! There he is holding his head high and walking towards me saying nonsense like before and if mom doesn’t help me he ends up hitting me.

I’ve had enough, because now i can’t hold an argument with him without stuttering or shivering and i hate it. I couldn’t sleep the day before yesterday when he punched me twice because of frustration, and when i did, i slept the whole day because I didn’t feel like getting out of bed. Now when i did get out, my little brother said he wanted to play minecraft with me so i did. And the above happend.

If i say I don’t want to talk to him or play with him he says “well, I want to.” And says who am I to refuse him. And that I will talk/ play or do whatever he wants because I’ll regret it if I don’t.

I’m tired, hurt, scared, angry, humiliated, furious and frustrated and many other things. I just want to mind my own business but he won’t let me. I feel that he’s treating me as his punching bag.

I’m sorry if my grammar is bad, i’m arabic as I’ve mentioned already and my head really hurts from crying already so I’ll just post this. Thanks if anyone has read this far and I’ll appreciate any advice.