Sat 23 Mar, 2019 06:24 am
I am very confused.
Recently, a uni acquaintance, let's call him person A, has started working with me after interning in several departments. I never really spoke to him during uni, the only time I spoke to him was during one class and afterwards we haven't really spoke.
At work he said to me he is bisexual but he is going "head-first" to the female side - which is fine.
There was a party that a female colleague was holding at an AirbnB and and we both attended. I was at this point never really interested in him at all. He was not the most attractive guy ever, but he has such a great personality that makes you feel good (my standards in guys are personality > looks).
So, me, person A and person B went out to the balcony and started to talk about work. It was going great and we went back into the Airbnb to join the rest of the people and it was starting to rain a bit more heavily. Now here is the things I did with person A when we high, higher, highest:
- Person A, B and C went out to the balcony, where I followed, so I was the fourth person. There were only 3 seats available, making me having to stand which I was fine with. However, person A said, "come sit on my lap", and I said, "I am fine, I can stand". However, he insisted. I then gave in and awkwardly sat on his lap. After a few minutes, I got extremely comfortable and wrapped my arms around him, and he did the same.
- All of us went back into the Airbnb and once again to hang out with the other people. There was a L-shaped sofa in front of the TV. I was sitting on the corner. (I will like to mention here that I love to hug things, regardless of the time and location, e.g. when going to uni, studying, I like to hug my bag etc.) I told person A, "sit on my lap", which he did not hesitate. Basically here I big spooned him and he was a small spoon. It lasted for probably 30 minutes.
- We all went down stairs and did our own thing, and he laid in the hallway and told me to lay down with him, but I refused because the floor was wet from all the people entering the house. I was like, "go upstairs and I will lay next to you", which he did. He sat up right on the sofa and I laid my head on his lap and we interlocked hands for a LONG time.
- The next thing was more intimate. Basically, we were watching Netflix (not chillin'), and I was basically hugging his leg and he wrapped his right hand on my shoulders. My right arm was literally in between the buttons of his shirt - I was caressing his body. I got really annoyed so I buttoned one of the buttons and I shoved my whole hand in his shirt and used my whole hand to caress his body. This is when I think I started to fall in love with him...
At work it wasn't awkward, but when I told my best Judy's at work, they were what the **** is going on? So I personally asked him myself now, my curiosity questions. I basically asked him, is he actually bisexual, would he date me? He basically said no to not lead me on and that he is thinking of going full steam ahead in the female direction.
Other colleagues got curious about our weird situation and they asked him and informed me (in a summarised version), he was a bisexual where he "did stuff" with another boy, however he has never had sex with another boy. He loved cuddles - but he only thought of the cuddles as cuddles and he would not "smash me".
He will proceed to say things, like "don't be angry at me, focus all your anger in giving me head", and he will back hug me.
It is pretty obvious he doesn't wanna date me which is fine, but EVERYBODY AT WORK is constantly teasing me about person A and that I can "change him" because he never said he hated being with the guy.
So what do you guys think? Should I just see where things go because there can be a chance? Or follow my initial instinct and leave him alone and find another boy?
Stop involving your work colleagues in your love life.
Ask the guy out for a coffee. And ask him point blank if he wants something. And if he doesn't, then tell him all this cuddling is downright confusing you.