Last night I had intercourse with a Human.

http://www.able2know.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=16347&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=110

Hello, I am Zog, and I have taken a deep breath to venture out from the "Unusual things about you" topic (the most appropriate place to hide), after making contact and having written intercourse with the following four humans on this forum :

1 Ciccerone Imposter. Initial contact was made on Page 12 (see above link) and things were going well until he refused to accept my proposal of abduction. It was at that point that I started to realise that I was not cut out for this whole abduction thing.

2 Cinnesthesia. This female immediately declared her attraction to me (page 13), but when I brought up the subject of abduction, she made her excuses and left before I even had a chance to sell her on the advantages of a good probing. I think however that there still might be just a chance with this one, and I could do with the commission.

3 A pencil sketch drawing of a man on fire then arrived. I believe he was called Kickycan. He was all for a good abduction as he looked upon it as some form of sexual excitement, but it turned out that he had previously been collected and probed via his sexual organ. I opened my heart to him and asked for his advice. Alas I did not get it, as a strange creature with large pink ears called ehbeth rudely butted in and took him away.

In a nutshell, I have been abducting humans all of my stage 2 life, and feel that I want to put something back for a change. I am thinking of jumping ship and settling somewhere on your Continent.
I would like to do charity work, and put a smile on human faces as I am sick of seeing endless streams of panicking victims. Their squeals first alerted me to the fact that they might not have been enjoying themselves.

I am seeking advice from you now, and ask the following questions :

1 What would be the best area to settle, and why ?
I have been told that with my height (three feet four inches) and my appearance, I would go unnoticed in the Appalachean Mountain area. Is this correct ? The pencil sketch invited me to New York, but I think that his motives were less than honourable.

2 Can you tell me what the present fashions are, so that I can arrange my wardrobe.?

3 What should I seek as employment ? I have advanced knowledge of Astro Physics. Will this go down well in Kentucky?
My only other unusual quality/talent, is that I have a twelve inch tongue and can breathe through my ears. What sort of thing could I do to make use of that talent?

Apart from the manic rabbit, I have been made to feel very welcome and look forward to having intercourse with you in the near future. I promise that my probing days are over.

Zog.