@okie,
The problem is that within a marriage many civil laws do not apply and that once a marriage is dissolved, the responsibility toward each other that is not laid out in the divorce agreement is dissolved.
The loans remained hidden until after the divorce.
No, there is nothing fishy about my power of attorney claim. I said he signed my name as though he had power of attorney which he did not.
You may not be aware of the fact that during the late 70s and into the mid-80s, many banks and other financial institutions made loans to men who signed on behalf of their wives. The savings and loan collapse was a good thing because many of these practices were abolished under the increased scrutiny given to banks. After our divorce, my youngest brother went to the bank that he and his wife used since their marriage, a small bank where everyone was known by their first names. My brother and his wife were considering refinancing their home, and, as he had to do something at the bank, thought he would ask what the current rates were. The vice president, who was also a friend of theirs, told him that he could not discuss rates with him without Mo (his wife) being present. Ah! Government controls do work to help people!
Quote:
It does make me wonder if you are needing some whipping boys to take out your lingering anger over your failed marriage, pom?
Can you say, "low blow," boys and girls? That is a truly tacky statement. I have been divorced for 16 years and never felt that it was failed marriage. If anything, I wish I has ended the marriage years before I did. I am not going to go into how hard I worked within the marriage to involve my ex with the kids he wanted. But, I have had two relationships since. I also do not feel jealousy. Jealousy is a waste of time.
All my life, I have been concerned with justice. I was motivated by justice even as a child in grade school. I hate untruths. If I attack people here it is 1.) in self-defense; 2.) in defense of others; 3.) to correct their errors; 4.) to defend myself, my children and grandchildren, the institutions of this nation that I uphold, the environment and the planet against the right wing.
Finally, you spoke to me once in a way that I am certain that you felt was kind but that I could not accept. You suggested that, perhaps, in my heart, I was a conservative. As I could not accept it, I ignored that statement. No anger, no reprisals. Nothing. So much better than acrimony and not as dishonest as thanking you would have been.
okie, I never felt that a marriage has to be permanent. I accept that I have a fault in working to make silk purses out of sow's ears. It is a genuine failing of mine and it caused me to spend far too much of my life doing things I should have abandoned.
I do not need counseling. My father was horrified that I went to college. He actually beat my mother in his frustration. I knew what I wanted but I modified where I went to school and what I majored in to suit my mother, who did not disapprove of the idea of college but rather my desired major and the fact that I wanted to leave home to do pursue it. I found a compromise in doing what she wanted but within the scope of my talents. My brothers did the same thing: chose majors that matched her ideas and not their own.
I returned to my own intellectual roots in graduate school. Both times, I followed my own interests and desires. When I was hired by the community college, I finally became what I wanted to be so many years before, a professor. I am not at an Ivy nor am I at a Big Ten or Pac-8 school but I am doing something that I am good at and not what any one else wants me to do.
I pursue my own hobbies, interests and dreams. Perhaps, not to the level that I would like. But to the level that I can, working with what is available to me.
