Help and let go?

Ok In my younger years of marriage My husband and i took in some girls who lived with us for qute a wile. A few of these girls well one more than the others still keeps in touch and calls when ever she feels the need to talk to me or the need of advice. Well I don't have a problem with this as i feel that when I took them in no matter what kind of people they were or turned out to be, they some how became a part of me and I love them like my own. Today she called and again she just called and Tim my husband says how come she is still calling and trying to come around. I just kind of looked at him like huh? It just caught me off gurard. I mean that is not some thing I would expect to hear from a guy who has and is about to adopt again. I mean we are taking in kids that are not our own. Whe they turn 18 are they gonna just go. He said well yeah but we have tooken in over 43 kids are they all forever gonna depend on us. He says I thought we are trying to move on and start our own family, If we are trying to do this we can't keep letting people who are needy to get in our lives. Ok peeps I think I'm just venting lol but He just floors me some times. Does he not sound selfish or is it just me? This girl is now 26, I pulled her out of a bad relationship one night and she lived with us for 3 years. she made life interesting to say the least but we did get her to move on and start living. She was not the worst one we took in by any means. I care about her like my own girl am I wrong for that? I think he's afraid she is going down the wrong road again and looking for a way out again. That may be true and I know me I can't seem to turn people away. But adopting is some thing I really want so there is not like there is room for her even if i wanted to help. Do you think if you help people you should just do it and let go? I remember all the people that have gone through my home bad and good and I did care and still do for them. Is that a flaw in me? Tim seems to think that you should help but remain detached. That is hard. That is one of the reasons why I don't do foster care lol. I can't help and detach. I'm not sure how to do that. My aunt is just like that. She adopted and they turned 18 and she told me you adopt to give them a home and what you can but you don't give them your life, You raise them and send them on their way. I was like What? Oh no I adopted My lil girl and I love her more than life it'self. My everything belongs to her. I said I do to being her mom and that means forever and though it was never in paper for the others I took in I feel the same way about them. I made sure I talked to tim to see how he felt and he says yes to the adopted kids. He says those are mine and I love them and I will be their dad forever. But thsoe other I have no commitment to. I dunno maybe I am wrong but that is just how I am. If you find your way into my heart you are not just removed from it at a certain point in life. Well thanks for Leting me vent. Hugssss all.
Always Maria