friends with benifits

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What are everyones opinions on friends with benefits?
My friend and I got drunk one night and we both blacked out and we are sure we did it. My friend says to me "The only thing I regret is that I do not remember". Then he says " friends with benefits are cool". I am actually very interested in the possibility of FWB but have reservations about it. I would not even know how to let him know I am interested, guess I should just straight up tell him.
Has anyone ever done this and if so how did it turn out?

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It probably will work out for a while, but eventually one of you guys will get hurt. Usually somebody falls in love and the other doesn't.

I've done that too, but me and the girl never really were friends. We'd only call each other when we had needs.

Another time, we started out as only FWB and then, I kind of fell in love with her. It sucked cause she didn't feel the same.

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Yup. Married the guy.

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My opinion is that some people can do it. Some people can't.

If you are prone to falling in love easily, I wouldn't suggest it.

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Well I am actually very much in love with this guy. We are like bestfriends and if he never feels the same for me I would like to think I will be okay with it. I just need to figure out how to let him know I am wanting to be FWB without just coming out and saying wanna f***? Or would that be ok? Mabey that is what guys prefer. Hehe this is a new situation for me so it is hard for me to be blunt with him.

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If you already love him, don't do it. It will only be harder to let go when he gets a girlfriend and you are out of the physical picture.

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pickandstick wrote:

I just need to figure out how to let him know I am wanting to be FWB without just coming out and saying wanna f***? Or would that be ok? Mabey that is what guys prefer. Hehe this is a new situation for me so it is hard for me to be blunt with him.

That is exactly what I would want to hear. Just say, "Hey I had a fun time the other night... want to do it again so you can remember this time?"

He'll smile then say yes.

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Like Kristi said, Don't do it if you in love. You'll feel like you wasted your time when he gets a girlfriend and your out of the picture. It's either physical only and no emotional stuff or vice versa. That's the only way it's going to work, unless you guys hook up as boyfriend and girlfriend.

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My opinion about FWBs is that it will work for some people, but personally I dislike the idea. I don't like the thought of being intimate with anyone I don't have feelings for, but other people don't have that mindset, and as long as it remains strictly physical, and both of you know the risks, I don't think it'd be a problem. It does become a problem when one falls for the other, but the other doesn't have the same feelings. If you feel that you want to be more than friends with this guy, I would discontinue the FWB relationship and talk to him about your feelings. Maybe he feels the same way, maybe not. But I think that it'd only lead to you being heartbroken if you two were having a physical relationship, and then he ends up stopping it to start a regular relationship with someone he cares about.

One of my friends had a FWB. She had had a horrible breakup and was lonely for affection. After awhile, he hated the situation. She became attached to him, and after they'd fool around, he said he felt dirty and used afterwards. But he felt so bad for her, having had her heart broken already, and also, how do you go from FWB to just regular friends again? It's tough!

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Yeah, the way you describe the situation, you're just setting yourself up to get hurt.

How 'bout starting out on the path you really want, instead of just a cheap unstable substitute.

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SCoates wrote:

Yeah, the way you describe the situation, you're just setting yourself up to get hurt.

How 'bout starting out on the path you really want, instead of just a cheap unstable substitute.

Yes that thought had occured to me too. I have alot to think about.

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i've had FWB and it kinda makes me feel like a slut...lol wierd? But when u r FWB usually the other person, whether you know it or not , hase a boyfriend of girlfiend... and doesn't in make you feel wierd that your just a piece of a$$? that that person doesn't want to be iwth you, just have sex...i don't know i don't really like it...

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what is interesting about this situation is that we are roomates and i know for a fact he is not with anyone right now. but i know what you mean and that is one of the reasons i have not done anything yet.

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pickandstick wrote:

what is interesting about this situation is that we are roomates and i know for a fact he is not with anyone right now. but i know what you mean and that is one of the reasons i have not done anything yet.

When someone prefers to remain a FwB, chances are that he has intentions of being with someone else, some time or another. It's almost always inevitable.

I can't say I didn't try this before... I hated it Confused

I had feelings for him, and I got burned Mad

You SHOULD NOT enter one if you have feelings for him, or if you'd prefer to be dating him. If you want to date him, wait until he's ready to date you. Don't do this to just pass the time, because the odds are high that will not get what you want.
If he gets the message or impression that this is *all* you need to be happy with him, what motivation does he have to -ever- date you seriously?

If you want things to be serious/meaningful with him, don't bring this in. It's very easy to be replaced when you're the "girl I sleep with" :/

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.:Aurora Dark:. wrote:

pickandstick wrote:
what is interesting about this situation is that we are roomates and i know for a fact he is not with anyone right now. but i know what you mean and that is one of the reasons i have not done anything yet.

When someone prefers to remain a FwB, chances are that he has intentions of being with someone else, some time or another. It's almost always inevitable.

I can't say I didn't try this before... I hated it I had feelings for him, and I got burned You SHOULD NOT enter one if you have feelings for him, or if you'd prefer to be dating him. If you want to date him, wait until he's ready to date you. Don't do this to just pass the time, because the odds are high that will not get what you want.
If he gets the message or impression that this is *all* you need to be happy with him, what motivation does he have to -ever- date you seriously?

If you want things to be serious/meaningful with him, don't bring this in. It's very easy to be replaced when you're the "girl I sleep with" :/

Agreed. Yes I truly want to belive that my feelings will not get in the way but history has proven that I am not capable of this. So bestfriends without benifits is where we stand. Thank you all for the feedback!

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Yah and usually someone falls in love, and if you are really good friends i really wouldn't risk it, cuz when they do get a gf or bf you are going to feel really awkward,

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Yah and usually someone falls in love, and if you are really good friends i really wouldn't risk it, cuz when they do get a gf or bf you are going to feel really awkward,

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