OMG! I got bananna in her eyes!!!

My cubs have walked in on me and squinney doing the nasty....but it doesn't seem to have warped them....

When Kylie was just little not a baby but a preschooler she somehow got into big brothers anti convulsants and ended up at the ER with tubes coming out of every orifice...she was paper white and suddenly she projectile vomited the charcoal they were pumping into her...now you may think you know what the color black is...and you may think you've seen the blackest black...but if you haven't seen someone vomit charcoal you are mistaken....VERY disconcerting....all meds were put under lock and key that day and they remained that way until the cubs were much older.....

ahh.. I have seen the charcoal vomit.
Scares the **** outta ya!
THAT just looks totally unnatural.
Cub was ok after that though right?

yeah...we got lucky.....she ate tegretol, klonopin and something else....luckily I caught it early and hauled ass to the ER......

Not really a crisis. Soveig, my ex, could be very confrontational. When the kids were little she and our son Marc got into it hot and heavy. It ended with Marc being sent off to bed still fuming. We settled down in the kitchen and talked for about half an hour. She got this very pensive look on her face and confessed to me that Marc might have been right. Suddenly from Marc's room came a loud "Hah!". She chuckled and told Marc in a pseudo gruff voice to go to sleep. I, of course, was laughing my head off.

THAT is funny.

When oldest d was little she liked to pick cherry tomatoes or raspberries off the vines and eat them. One day I was working in the garden and turned around to check on her. I saw two streams of mud sliding down from the corners of her mouth. She had plucked a large onion out of the ground and was eating it like an apple- skin, mud and all. She's always been an adventurous eater but that was a bit much.

I was making breakfast one morning and my son, aged about two, reached up to the counter when my back was turned and drank from the frozen fruit juice can where I'd been putting the hot bacon grease.

The grease was extremely hot, his lips immediately swelled to at least three times their size and of course, he was screaming.

At least his dad was there with me (I was making his breakfast.) We grabbed ice and some other cold things (and our three-year-old daughter) and rushed to the emergency room, trying to have our little guy suck on popsicles all the way there. Luckily, the doctors determined he hadn't swallowed any nor damaged his throat. He had blisters in his mouth though and a few on his chest, but mostly his lips looked just awful. (My beautiful boy.... waaaahhhh.)

I never ever put bacon grease in anything like that again. I didn't cook bacon for several years afterwards; just totally freaked about it. His lip shrank back down within a couple of days and he was fully recovered within two weeks. Of course, he's fine now but I still shudder to think of it. All my fault -- I made so many mistakes: putting the grease in something that would look tempting, not putting that container further back on the counter, allowing him to be underfoot in the kitchen and not watching him more closely.

Banana in the eye? I wish!

Bean's just precocious, shewolf.

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Banana Moon Facial Mask- recipe

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The son of one of my colleagues just drank some nail polish remover. She was hysterical for a couple of days. Once she stopped crying, so did he.

When my older son was born we were dirt poor. The only rocking chair we had was a child sized one that my husband's aunt had givenus. So, since I was petite in those days, that's what I rocked him in. One day, when he was about 9 months old, I was rocking him in the chair. When i went to get up, I lost my grip on him. He tumbled off my lap and flat on his face on the hardwood floor. His little nose came loose from his face at the septum.

We rushed him to the ER. (Thankfully, we only lived a couple of blocks from the hospoital.) They stitched his nose back on. He was fine. I was a basket case, though. No one could console me. That was the last time I rocked him in that chair.

A neighbor's child was in our front yard talking about the garden with my husband. He rushed in with her to tell me she ate an azalea flower; he'd remembered I'd mentioned azaleas are poisonous.

He'd probably shown her rosemary, or something else edible, in the garden viewing, and that clued her in you could eat plants. She'd gobbled the azalea before he could stop her. (I'm guessing in retrospect that she was 5 or 6.)

He took her home, mom was out as I remember, and dad was working in back yard and just said don't worry about it.
I in the meantime was on the phone to Children's Hospital Poison Control.

Phew! One azalea blossom not a problem, they said. Yikes!

Had a couple over for dinner a few months ago. They have three kids to our one. We were discussing having their daughter hold our baby with some help.

The dad's comment?

Oh, yeah. She's your first, right? We just assume now that the baby will be dropped at some point.

I also understand that there are some baby stages that most parents do not discuss.

Crawling - discuss.
Babbling - discuss.
Walking - discuss.
Retrieve food from inside baby's nose - do not discuss.

ok, I'm game...

Just the other day, oldest dd (14 years old) swallowed a gel-cap vitamin supp and instantly started shrieking about her head hurting. She was holding on to the side of her face and flailing around the kitchen in obvious pain. She said the vitamin went up her sinus, I said it couldn't have. A couple minutes later, still in great pain, she said she'd felt something pop and felt the need to blow her nose. Sure enough, vitamin powder from the gel cap was blowing out her nose. She continued to blow and a few minutes later felt something slide down the back of her throat. She gagged it up and there was the rest of the partially dissolved gelcap. Never heard of such a thing, and if I hadn't seen it, I wouldn't have believed it!

Horrid Moments of Motherhood

My younger son was six months old and running a 105 degree fever. (I was later to discover that he was the type to run high fevers with no ill effects).

I was regularly taking his temperature and sponging him down and taking his temperature and checking in with the doctor--aided by my two year old son.

Coming back from the telephone, I saw the two year old, bent over the bassinet, cooing. He was playing doctor, inserting birthday candles in his brother's bottom.

The pediatrician roared with laughter and told me that was a first in his experience.

One of mine is when my younger son was 13 or 14. He was waiting in the car while I ran into the grocery store to pick up something for dinner. When i walked back to the car, it was locked. I knocked on the window and a strange young man looked out at me. At that instant, I saw my car next to the one I had knocked on. I also saw my son slouching down as low as he could go in order to disappear. God, I was sooo uncool when he was 14. Funny, he thinks I'm really cool now that he is 28...

BTW, I've had the pleasure of seeing shewolfnm and Mr. shewolfnm with their baby. That little girl is one of the luckiest in the world. Both parents are completely in love with her (and with each other).

Smooches to all the wolves in Austin.

this is a skill that's going to come in very handily when your daughter is in university, J_B. one of the most admired fellas at my residence was the one who could swallow a banana and have it come out through his nose.

she's got a future, i tell ya.

Cute post..lol

When my oldest one was..umm, 3..maybe 4 he was in daycare. When he got home he was complaining about his ear. We looked...flashlight and all, and could see something pale inside. Soooooo, took him to the doctor to see what was going on. Now remind you that these people are college educated..lol, this doctor put him on an antibiotic for the swelling inside his ear. Ok.....
So.... at an appt. a week later, its still there. So.......we then get sent to a specialist to see whats going on in his ear. This child had to be put under and come to find out it was a piece of pea gravel that he had thrown up in the air at daycare and somehow had gotten lodged in his ear. But with what it cost us to get one piece of pea gravel out of his ear, we could have paved the driveway at the daycare..lol


My husband when he was little got a nut stuck on his middle finger at a family reunion. He went around flipping people off, showing him the stuck nut. LOL He was hollering..."it tuck momma, it tuck"...lol

Oh yes.. food up the nose..

Bean.. ( I sware she is famous by now )
She was learning how to feed herself with bananna pieces when she was 7-8 mos?? about then??
Anyways, so she is sitting at the table with me and I am handing her small pieces of bananna watching her suck on them and smear them all over the place.
Seeing that she was getting bored and probally full, I reached over to take a piece out of her hand so I could start cleaning her up.
She did NOT like that idea. So i held it between my finger and thumb so she could eat the rest of it while I tried to be supermom and wipe her hands with my OTHER hand. As i leaned over the table ( still holding the bananna piece in position) to grab the wet cloth, I felt her mouth rubbing my fingers. So.. I pushed my hand forward a bit so she could still reach it.
She took the piece. I grabbed the wash cloth, wiped my hands off and turned to begin wiping bean's hands and face.... and there it was.. the bananna piece stuffed right into her little nostril.
HA! I cried, I laughed, I stared and she just sat ever so still looking at me with this horrified look on her face not wanting to move an inch.
This poooooor child. !