Hubbys best friend likes me? long post

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So here is my situation.
I live in a house with my husband, 9 month old daughter , and my husbands best friend. My husband and I are going to be divorced soon. We got married because we thought it was the right thing to do but we never actualy loved eachother. We get along much better now that we have admitted this fact and are working together to make a good life for our daughter. We are dating other people while the divorce is in progress Well my husbands best friend and I spend quite a bit of time together. I have always just thought of us as friends, but lately he has been telling everyone we are bestfriends not him and my husband. When I say I want to do something he wants to do it too. I joined a gym and he did too and wants me to call him when I get off work so he can go with me even though it is very late at night and he has to get up early. I told him next year I am moving out and he said he wanted to move with me. We go out alot like to the movies and for drives. We talk alot about everything like relationships future plans and what we like in a gir/boyfriend Confused

. It goes on. So the other day I am chatting with a friend (female) of mine and telling her this and she says men and women can not be best friends. She follows with "you are in love with this guy and he is in love with you". Well I don't know now. After thinking about what she said I am starting to wonder what his feelings are. Do guys usually spend this much time with a female and consider them a best friend and not want a relationship with them. Don't guys just tell ladies when they like them or do they hint around forever. Mabey I am just oblivious but it does seem that he hints around alot. Ok so this is a book but it is driving me nuts cause I would actually like to start up a relationship with this guy someday, I know things are somewhat complicated right now and mabey this is why he has not asked me out. But then there is the possibility that he does just consider us friends.
So any suggestions or opinions on this matter? It would be apretiated.

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Rule # 5678 of dating:

Do not under, any circumstances, date his friends.

This will lead to nothing but trouble.

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If he is willing to renounce his friend ship with your husband ( wich im sure he has known longer then you) to be ' friends' with you.. he isnt a very loyal boy, isnt very reliable and um... with that behavior why date him? He would renounce his relationship with you to find a new g/f just as easily.

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shewolfnm wrote:

If he is willing to renounce his friend ship with your husband ( wich im sure he has known longer then you) to be ' friends' with you.. he isnt a very loyal boy, isnt very reliable and um... with that behavior why date him? He would renounce his relationship with you to find a new g/f just as easily.

wow did not think of that

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jouyoku- Welcome to A2K!

One of the worst things that a person can do, is to bounce from one relationship, right into another. If you divorce your husband, you need time to gather yourself together, and figure out how you are going to make a life with your daughter.

I think that you need to "cool it" with this man for awhile. It is important that you learn to understand yourself, and why your marriage did not work. If you don't, you are bound to make yet another mistake. Go slow!

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I have to disagree with your friend when she said, "men and women can not be best friends". As of now I've had 3-4 male best friends throughout my life, and they were -so close- to me that I didn't want to bring romance into the picture Razz

Now, as for your situation...

Don't get involved with his friends! I attempted that once, and regretted it (never been married, so he was just a bf of mine). We broke up, and soon after I starting being linked with his friend, and started considering a relationship...
Well, he found out, and freaked. out. Perhaps not all guys would have such an extreme reaction, but he was very hurt and upset at both of us... because imagine, if that guy STAYED as a best friend to your hubby, it would always interfere with their friendship. They would never be the same, I can assure you of that. To see your friend dating your ex-wife, whether you loved her or not, is almost a blow in the face... it's a "you couldn't keep her (for whatever reason), so I have her instead" message always being tossed around.

So... no, too much trouble there :/ It's not worth it, unless they completely separate, and you intend to break off some ties (or loosen then dramatically) with this "hubby" of yours.

Again, I can't say my own example speaks for everyone... but it's something I wouldn't even risk again Wink

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Hubbys best friend likes me? long post

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