@izzythepush,
None of us has their life together.
We spend a great deal of energy pretending we do though. Especially Frank Apisa, who tells me over and over again how happy he is. Then why do I feel a twinge of pity listening to him?
I know this because I've examined a few measures of success from the inside.
My brother is an archetypal consummate businessman. He lives in Texas working for a banking company (don't worry, you have heard of it) known as Capital One. He has a wife, and two kids. But both of them are wild animals with a huge sibling rivalry going on. They don't really set many limits, and ultimately his work is an escape from dealing with family, and she's on the phone alot when we've seen her so yeah her too. The kids are both spoiled and neglected, so there's a sense that nobody's got time for them. They have a life that is rich in things but poor in soul. Thankfully, they are self-aware and seem to be raising their kids religious. Heaven knows their lifestyle led to alot of rushing around to nowhere.
Then there's my sister. By all accounts, she is a happy housewife. Yet she is a very hard-edged tiger mom, and seems borderline abusive to her kids. Think of a mom that doesn't let the kids have more than ten pieces of Halloween candy, and you've got a very good idea of how unspoiled these kids are. She had a mother-in-law keep visiting her during early stages after pregnancy, and it was gonna be failure to thrive, so she's basically super-protective of her kids, being neurotic to the point where she won't even let them worry about death (basically, she won't even let them watch Bambi). This entire COVID thing? They've basically ordered food rather than just going to the store. The kids seem sort of happy? But I suspect college life will be a problem. Like her brother, she seems to have bit off more than she could chew. She probably wanted kids, but now it seems like more than she can handle. Or sure, she puts up a good front, but she seems too stern like she's angry about something.
Her husband is sweet (much sweeter than her), but we barely get to see him because he's a nurse. And now he's got troubles because the nursing office went woke and has reorganized to put the previous nurses in another office halfway across the town from the new building, making it impossible for them to do more than train others to do their job.
To make matters worse, this town went woke and started smashing up Civil War statues cuz racism, and her area went from being the trendy hip area to one that seems on the verge of becoming the bad part of town. It's still suburbs, from the look of the houses, but it's surrounded by increasingly hostile city.
My parents are the closest thing I know to people who have things figured out. They have money between work and inheritance, they have each other, and they have their faith. But even they get into some pretty nasty arguments. My dad seems jealous of my mom always on the phone with her friends, and my mom keeps getting sucked into unprofitable favors for people who don't appreciate her, driving to other towns much of the week.
Me? I'm a trans girl who basically washed up in terms of jobs (realized I wasn't a great fit for any boss), and got discouraged after two years of COVID crap for a self-employed gig. I have no financial prospects that any girl would be into, and sorry boys but I don't want anal or oral, so yeah basically no love life either. I mainly just pursue hobbies, but most days I'm bored and depressed to the point of wanting to sleep my life away. Having observed some very different extremes from my siblings and parests, I can safely tell anyone who claims they have their life in order that no, something is usually missing. And with you lot, the answer's pretty obvious.
There is none of us who has life figured out. None of us is an expert. Which is why we attend a forum with the motto, "Ask the experts." We're all hoping that some expert will help us straighten our lives out, or we wouldn't be here.
I'm just easy to pick on, because I'm honest about this.