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Sun 17 Dec, 2017 01:54 pm
So last semester there was this girl that really liked me, we had a snap streak and texted somewhat, although at the time I really was not that into her, we only made out a couple of times, no sex. I think I just liked the attention. Recently however I've had a change of heart and now I think that I am developing feelings for her. Its almost like Karma, I really want to have sex with her and see where things go from there. In person she is very flirty and theres alot of sexual tension but she waits several hours/ days to respond to my snapchats/ texts. I invited her to a christmas party I had and felt like we really hit things off. The next day she invited me to her dorm and we started making out for at least 40 mins ! Longest I had ever kissed a girl, unfortunately like the rookie i am, i did not have any condoms with me so I told her straight up " I really want to have sex with you but I have no condoms" she told me that it was totally fine and that we could just have sex some other time, but a part of me feels like she is just toying with me, we were on the floor of her dorm the entire time and when I asked her if she wanted to continue on the bed she told me that she just made it and did not want to mess up the covers.... wtf, also as we were kissing I was caressing her inner thigh, as I started to get closer and closer to her spot she grabbed my hand and placed it on her waist. Last semester all her friends had told me she stopped hooking up with other people because she was crushing on me so hard, but now it seems like she is deliberately trying to be distant and only hits me up when shes bored. I feel like this relationship is really going no where and I really want to be more than just a flirty friend but I am unsure if she is just messing with me out of spite, if she is truly interested in me and is playing hard to get, or genuinely does not even want to have sex anymore, any thoughts ?
@ainan,
ainan wrote:
wtf, also as we were kissing I was caressing her inner thigh, as I started to get closer and closer to her spot she grabbed my hand and placed it on her waist.
After reading this sentence, I am pretty certain you are completely misreading signs. You are taking things too personally. A simple thing like the above can easily be explained yet you interpret it as if she is playing hard to get? No. All I can say is no, it has nothing to do with that.
My advice is quit questioning certain things. Like the whole bed thing. You seem to take it personal that she doesn't want to mess it up. Some girls are just tidy and it makes more sense not to deal with "overly anxious" guys messing up her bed.
Just continue with what you are doing, next time be more prepared and you'll see that she wasn't playing hard to get or leading you on. So you can stop reading so much into all of it.
For what it's worth, I've moved a guy hand away from "my spot"
because I was having my period, and didn't want to go down that road.
@chai2,
chai2 wrote:
For what it's worth, I've moved a guy hand away from "my spot"
because I was having my period, and didn't want to go down that road.
Thank you for making my day.
Did you put his hand back after the road was all clear?
@ainan,
Did it ever cross your mind that this girl is not ready for sex- with anyone, much less with you?
How much do you know about her? You really have not made her your GF and spent time with her to establish a real connection.
Because you have ONE thing in mind: Your horney self.
Spend some dating time with her and take the pressure off for this to be all about sex.
Can you do that?
@Krumple,
Krumple wrote:
chai2 wrote:
For what it's worth, I've moved a guy hand away from "my spot"
because I was having my period, and didn't want to go down that road.
Thank you for making my day.
Did you put his hand back after the road was all clear?
Hell yeah!
I don't know if you're a man or woman krumble, but that's something men don't usually think of. The woman's thinking "Don't you GET it?!!!"
I learned not to be shy about saying why not, so as not to discourage someone I liked in the future.
@chai2,
chai2 wrote:
Krumple wrote:
chai2 wrote:
For what it's worth, I've moved a guy hand away from "my spot"
because I was having my period, and didn't want to go down that road.
Thank you for making my day.
Did you put his hand back after the road was all clear?
Hell yeah!
I don't know if you're a man or woman krumble, but that's something men don't usually think of. The woman's thinking "Don't you GET it?!!!"
I learned not to be shy about saying why not, so as not to discourage someone I liked in the future.
There can be a whole laundry list (pun intended) as to why she would feel the need to move his hand a way. Being playful, testing him to see how aggressive he is, or which if I had to guess in his (OP) situation. I bet she moved his hand because she knew he didn't have condoms and she didn't want to get worked up to the point of no return. She was fine making out, laying on the floor but she didn't want to take any unnecessary risks.
The problem is she probably should have followed it up with an explanation so he wouldn't be confused like he is, dreaming up all sorts of reasons as to why she would do such a thing.
She knows why she did it. If she doesn't say anything, you can ask or you can assume.
@Krumple,
Really just making a light comment Krumple.
Not taking this guys issues to heart at all, nor do I wonder what is going on with the girl.
99% of these “relationships” questions are just so much wasted time.
@chai2,
chai2 wrote:
Really just making a light comment Krumple.
Not taking this guys issues to heart at all, nor do I wonder what is going on with the girl.
99% of these “relationships” questions are just so much wasted time.
Oh but they are fun.
I think its because most things in our lives have definitive explanations or ways to obtain their solutions. But when it comes to relationships and human psychology, there are no patterns. Sometimes it seems to make no sense at all. So people want to connect with others who may have gone through similar experiences and what they did about them.
I think in this case the guy just had a few insecurities. Rather than ask her he wanted some outsiders perspectives on what is going on. I think I gave him a few and I bet he feels a little better about this whole thing.
Was it a waste of time to give him some relief? No. If he got a little bit of relief from this, it might improve his relationship with her. So that is never a waste of time.
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