Lost

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I see you two are a very young married couple who got a good thing going. Aren't you afraid this might ruin it? It's one thing to talk about it openly, as a fantasy even. But things might take a twisted turn once you get the ball roilling.

Just beware of your actions. If he's ok with it now, wouldn't that imply that if it ever happen to him (being attracted to a good friend of yours) you would have to be ok with it too?

This situation seems rather strange.

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Hey, whatever works for you both!

I'd take a conservative side in a situation like this, but that's me. And I have never been in those shoes, so don't mind me.

Good luck!

Yes im quoting myself

see where you are coming from
Hiya,
Firstly, you seem like a very open and honest person and I'd like to say I respect that. I can relate as my fiance (been together and living together 4 years now) are similar in that sense. I'm also a tomboy/girl type and until recently haven't gotten along with women very well. I used to not even try because like you, found them to be drama and catty. I have some girls I hang out with on occasion and try to find the good in them.

To the subject, we ourselves have talked of bringing a girl, guy or couple in as I like women and men. It's a tough road because you have to be honest with yourself and is hard to admit jealousies and insecurities. I also think a friend of his is cute but he thinks my girl pals are cute. I don't know that we'll ever do anything but we are open to the idea of it, but certaintly not going to push it.

I guess if your husband is into it then that's different. Maybe you should ask him what turns him on about it. I must be honest and say I kinda notice it seems like you have what I used to have about women (rightfully so for all I know) a chip on your shoulder about being friends with women.

I finally broke down my psyche and admitted I liked having guy pals because it was an ego boost. I also found that jealousy is a useless emotion. I don't quite understand why you'd want a guy just like your husband to fool around with or him to have a girl similar to you. In a sense that defeats the main reason most people want 'outside' interaction. The whole point is that it *is* someone different. If I wanted to fool around with a girl or guy similar to my fiance, I don't see the point of making the risk to our relationship to do it at all. About the porn thing, I have no problems or insecurities with it anymore. Sure it's fantasy, but what purpose does being jealous of a girl on screen do for me, or any girl for that matter.

I don't know if those thoughts help or anything but I guess it's something more to think about. Like I said, I respect the fact that you can post and so much so that I registered just to respond because I thought it was neat of you to have the guts to do so. I guess the whole thing is, is the 'risk' worth the 'reward' , that's my whole question too.

edit: oh yeah, I'm 26 and he is 25 so you know what age group/range I'm responding from.

OreO,

The things in your posts that jump out at me over and over is that your husband seems to have picked up on what was your fantasy and has turned it into his. It didn't turn you on when he said he pictured his friend behind you as you performed oral sex. It sounds like you were/are totally satisfied with having your fantasy be just that and now maybe your husband is moving things along a little faster than you're ready for.

The only advice I can offer is to go at your own pace, do what you are comfortable with and if you only want it to be a fantasy then that's what it should remain.

:wink:

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