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Relationship advice please help

 
 
Reply Fri 3 Nov, 2017 08:25 pm
So i met this guy on tinder! I know its not the best place to find something serious but i started talking to this guy for a few weeks then we decided to meet up. We went out for dinner on our first date. He was very sweet and respectful which i really appreciated. After that day we went on another few more dates. Im not sure if he's into me. I cannot tell. Yes he holds my hand and hugs me but he has not made a move to kiss me and we have been talking for about a month. One night we went over his place and he still didn't try anything with me. He calls me all the time and we text throughout the day. He makes an effort to see me and plan dates.
Recently he stopped sending me text messages which is rare because he used to always text me every morning. We haven't spoke in about a week and im very bummed out i dont know what to think.
Please i need some advice, should i text him or should i just wait????

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maxdancona
 
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Reply Fri 3 Nov, 2017 08:51 pm
@jackydel,
Yes, you should text him. Why don't you plan a date? Figure out something fun that he would like to do, or a restaurant that you think he would like... and ask him out.

You don't have to wait for a guy to kiss you. This is the 21st century, if you want a kiss, then either ask for one, or just kiss him. There is no reason that women need to sit around and wait for men to make a move.
jackydel
 
  1  
Reply Fri 3 Nov, 2017 09:15 pm
@maxdancona,
Thank you, I will definitely text him.
I just didn't want to seem too clingy, I was figuring if he is as into me he wouldn't wait for my text.
maxdancona
 
  1  
Reply Fri 3 Nov, 2017 09:40 pm
@jackydel,
A text after almost a week is nowhere near clingy. Clingy would be at least three unanswered texts.

I am a man. I would respond favorably if a women texted me saying something like "I really enjoy spending time with you, I would like to see you again." That would be upbeat and show your interest. The key is to invite him to respond without being demanding.

There is no way to know if he is into you or not without asking him. Any number of things could be happening. If you like him, let him know and see what happens.


jackydel
 
  1  
Reply Fri 3 Nov, 2017 10:12 pm
@maxdancona,
But wouldn't he text me if he was interested?
Thank you so much again, you're being really helpful.
maxdancona
 
  1  
Reply Sat 4 Nov, 2017 07:45 am
@jackydel,
Quote:
But wouldn't he text me if he was interested?


I don't know. Maybe he is thinking the same thing about why you aren't texting him Wink. You can't read someone's mind by whether they text or not.

If you like him, then text him to tell him you want to see him again. If you text him one or two times... no one will think badly of you.

There is a chance that he will ignore you (in which case you have your answer). There is a chance that he likes you a little, but isn't sure and that getting a nice text from you will convince him to take another look. There is a chance that he likes you a lot but maybe work was really stressful this week. Who knows?

Send one or two nice texts saying you want to see him. Suggesting a date (concert, restaurant) that you want to go to is a good idea. Keep the text positive, and leave the door open. If he doesn't respond, then you can move on. If he does respond, then maybe something great will come out of it.

I will make only a short comment about gender roles. The days where women had to sit patiently by the phone for a man to call are over. There is nothing wrong with you initiating. If you like a man, go for it.
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