5
   

Is it normal for a guy not to care if his friends flirt with you?

 
 
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 02:13 pm
My boyfriends friends always flirt with me and some of the things they say are pretty spicy. My bf says it turns him on that his friends like me so much. Is this normal? The jokes make me a little uncomfortable.
  • Topic Stats
  • Top Replies
  • Link to this Topic
Type: Question • Score: 5 • Views: 1,739 • Replies: 23

 
ehBeth
 
  4  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 02:15 pm
@Kiersten 0825,
Given what you've posted here and in the train thread, it reads as if he is grooming you for sexual activity with other people.

Please be very careful around this guy.
Kiersten 0825
 
  0  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 02:17 pm
@ehBeth,
What do you mean by grooming? Sorry not familiar with the lingo
0 Replies
 
najmelliw
 
  4  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 02:25 pm
@Kiersten 0825,
If it makes you uncomfortable, it's not normal to you.

If you ever find that something is making you 'uncomfortable', but feel pressured to engage or undergo in it anyway, because it is 'the norm' , then you are not taking care of number one.

I read your thread where you said your bf wants to run a train too. This 'boy' doesn't really shape up in the 'friend' department, if you ask me. You should get rid of him.

You have one life, and you get just one chance to live it. So you should make sure you enjoy it, but not at the risk of becoming one of the 'Me too' crowd.

Edit: Grooming means as much as 'preparing you for', certainly in that context
Kiersten 0825
 
  0  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 02:30 pm
@najmelliw,
He makes me feel crazy for not wanting these things. Constantly telling me that his feelings are normal and mine aren't. He says "it's my biological norm" to have multiple men coming after me.
ehBeth
 
  4  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 02:49 pm
@Kiersten 0825,
grooming means preparing you for something
to make you think it's acceptable / normal

this boy/man is NOT a friend

you need to think about why you are willing to be with someone who is trying to push you past your sexual knowledge and comfort level

he is not behaving as a kind, normal, boyfriend should

__

please talk to an adult about this

your boyfriend's sexual pressures and suggestions need to be known by an adult

I"m not quite at the point where I'd suggest someone let the police know ... but I'm close

talk to an adult you trust - parent / teacher/ counsellor/priest/adult relative

0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  5  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 02:52 pm
@Kiersten 0825,
Kiersten 0825 wrote:

He makes me feel crazy for not wanting these things.


this is a really bad sign

please talk to an adult

and

break up with this person

0 Replies
 
najmelliw
 
  3  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 03:04 pm
@Kiersten 0825,
Kiersten 0825 wrote:

He makes me feel crazy for not wanting these things. Constantly telling me that his feelings are normal and mine aren't. He says "it's my biological norm" to have multiple men coming after me.


You are in charge of your own feelings, not him, and certainly where it concerns your body.

Frankly, I completely agree with ehBeth in that you shouldn't hang around this fellow, but if you feel a need to discuss things with him regardless, you might point out that it's certainly not the biological norm for a man to want to share 'his' woman with other males, so where on earth does he come off telling you that his feelings are normal?

However, I would avoid this subject in particular, and his company in general, altogether.
0 Replies
 
ossobucotemp
 
  3  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 03:08 pm
@Kiersten 0825,
This is serious stuff and yet you are not listening to any of us who are warning you. Your supposed "boyfriend" is not a friend, but an ugly minded user.

Please reread your posts and the posts of those of us trying to get you to pay attention and take this seriously.

Again, as ehBeth and others have said:
talk to an adult you trust - parent / teacher/ counsellor/priest/adult relative
0 Replies
 
centrox
 
  1  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 03:15 pm
@Kiersten 0825,
Kiersten 0825 wrote:

He makes me feel crazy for not wanting these things. Constantly telling me that his feelings are normal and mine aren't. He says "it's my biological norm" to have multiple men coming after me.

What are your ages?
Region Philbis
 
  1  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 03:55 pm
@centrox,

in the other thread she said she is 17...
centrox
 
  1  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 04:03 pm
@Region Philbis,
Region Philbis wrote:
in the other thread she said she is 17...

Yes, but what is his age?
Kiersten 0825
 
  0  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 04:30 pm
@centrox,
He's 21
centrox
 
  2  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 04:36 pm
Where I live a guy aged 30 persuaded a teenage girl that he was her "boyfriend" and also that in his "culture" it is normal for a guy to share his girlfriend. His "friends" were actually paying him. He got ten years and the others five to seven.
0 Replies
 
centrox
 
  2  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 04:38 pm
@Kiersten 0825,
Kiersten 0825 wrote:
He's 21

He's a groomer and an abuser. I bet those friends of his are paying him to have sex with you. Dump him and go to the police if he won't leave you alone. This is serious.
Kiersten 0825
 
  0  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 04:53 pm
@centrox,
We've been dating for a year though. This seems like I'm overreacting. He's a good guy. I think he just wanted to try something different. I promise he doesn't hurt me
PUNKEY
 
  3  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 05:02 pm
He wants to watch while you are with another guy - doing things?

That guy is sick.
Kiersten 0825
 
  -1  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 05:23 pm
@PUNKEY,
We'll sort of. He wants to be with me and he wants another guy(s) to be with me at the same time. Which I know is worse. I just wondered if it could be normal for a college guy...
ehBeth
 
  2  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 05:55 pm
@Kiersten 0825,
No.

He is not a good guy.

A good guy would not try to have you have sex with his friends. Especially since it's clear you haven't known what he was asking you to do.

That is not a nice guy.

Tell an adult.
0 Replies
 
glitterbag
 
  3  
Reply Tue 31 Oct, 2017 07:07 pm
@Kiersten 0825,
This guy is a criminal. Get your ass out of there double pronto.
0 Replies
 
 

Related Topics

Flirting? I Say Yes... - Question by LST1969
about guys - Question by msgabriells
Scouting out guys at the grocery store. - Discussion by littlek
Teasing or friendly - Question by JoshHamington
How Do You Flirt?? - Discussion by MangoTango323
 
  1. Forums
  2. » Is it normal for a guy not to care if his friends flirt with you?
Copyright © 2021 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.03 seconds on 08/02/2021 at 06:53:52