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Journey

 
 
Reply Fri 31 Dec, 2004 08:48 am
is the paragraph okay?
If not, please edit it:

We took a taxi to Nankai University from Tianjin West Railway Station, a journey that would take us about twenty to thirty minutes. The taxi driver, a middle-aged man with a rugged complexion and expressive features, was very friendly and helpful. He had a real big voice, chatting with us constantly in typical Tianjin dialect as he drove along. We talked to him a bit about Mr. Chern, which brought an immediate response from him: "I've heard of him, a great mathematician, absolutely incredible! Anyone in Tianjin with a bit of common sense would have surely heard of him. What a great talent! " The driver kept talking with an air of pride, looking around out of the car from time to time, and searching for a flower shop along the street. He meant to drop us for a bouquet of flowers to be presented to Mr. Chern.
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Wy
 
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Reply Fri 31 Dec, 2004 10:50 am
Very nice! I have one question -- is it Mr. Chen or Mr. Chern? It should be consistent.

My only comment is about the last sentence. It sounds as though the driver is going to leave you behind and take only the flowers to Mr. Chen! Smile

Try something like, "We had asked him to stop so we could buy a boquet to take to Mr. Chen." ("of flowers" is unneccessary -- you've already established the flower shop.)
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oristarA
 
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Reply Fri 31 Dec, 2004 11:29 pm
Nice catch (about buying flowers), Wy!

Thanks.
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