Is this abuse?

Reply Fri 13 Oct, 2017 11:01 am
My dad constantly shouts at me, says he's sick of me and that I'm a waste of space. He's called me stupid, antisocial, miserable, selfish, conceited and all that just today. He doesn't do it all the time, only like 3 times a week, and sometimes he's alright. He is not as bad to my brother so I can't help feel like it's my fault but I always feel like I am a failure compared to my brother. I go in my room all the time because I don't want to be shouted at. He always threatens to take away my stuff for no reason. When I try to talk to him he tells me to get the **** out of his face and all that and a lot of the time even when just eating dinner he will look at me in disgust and shake his head. Whenever I ask him to stop once he calms down he either tells me that he didn't do anything or that it was my fault. He's kind of nasty to my mom and sometimes to my brother but a lot of the time he is nice and does stuff for me like buy me stuff and asks if I am okay. I do admit that I am a bit withdrawn and shy and I am a bit emotionless in the way that I have the same facial expression and a monotone voice. Am I just being a bad child?? My brother sometimes doesn't believe the things that I tell him about my dad. Am I just overreacting and this is normal for young teenagers?
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cicerone imposter
Reply Fri 13 Oct, 2017 03:44 pm
@Holly Young,
He is a sick man who needs help. Also, get counseling for yourself. Your school must surely have one. If not, talk to your principal. He may be able to refer you.

My older brother was very abusive when we were young. I considered him a psycho for his need to control everything I did. If I didn't come home from church with the day's newsletter, he would beat me up, and he didn't even go to church himself. He was a hypocrite with mental issues.

Not long ago, he told me to "forget our childhood," not "forgive me for treating you so badly." I forgave him long ago, but what he did to me during my childhood will not be forgotten for the rest of my life.
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Reply Fri 13 Oct, 2017 08:51 pm
@Holly Young,
Can you talk to your mom and is she able to help you? If not, maybe you can speak to another adult that might have influence on your father.
He should realize that his behavior towards you is unacceptable and yes, this is abuse! Verbal abuse at its worst and you don't have to take this. No one deserves to be spoken to in this manner and if your father doesn't realize it himself then he needs to be told how destructive such verbal assaults are.

You are not overreacting and this is not normal behavior, not at all!
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