I think I’m in love with two people?

Hello I’d love to hear some advice ideas or thought on what I’m currently going through. A brief description I’ve been with my boyfriend since 2009 he’s all I’ve ever know and has been my only boyfriend. He’s great when he’s not in a bad mood I’ll admit he’s pretty disrespectful and has been violent at times I’ve broken up with him at least twice and comes back begging for me to stay and of course I always come back because I feel guilty. I’ve met someone else we considered our selves best friends we’ve talked about everything and of course ended up liking each other it’s been over a year that we’ve been talking I’ve never physically cheated but considering that I talk to someone I consider it cheating but where I become confused is the person I talk to a lust thing because they give me the attention that I want? Or am I just afraid to take a risk? I limit myself so much for my current relationship I wonder if I’m not taking enough risk but I don’t want to hurt anyone