My goodness. Aren't we busy?
Okay Frank, we have done this before.
You ask for an explanation for the wacky words of the Torah;
I give you one based on whatever rabbinical source that I come up with;
You tell me that that is not the Torah!
As you do not seem to be able to get beyond this particular point, I am going to explain it once again.
The belief system of Judaism says that Moses received both the Written Torah - the one you are trying to argue; and the Oral Torah.
The Oral Torah was to explain the written Torah.
The Oral Torah was eventually written down in what is called the Talmud.
The tradition of consulting the Oral Torah to decipher the Written Torah continues to this day with continual disagreements and agreements as to what G-d actually meant or said - in the form of commentaries which are accepted (or not) as valid exegesis of the Torah; meaning as a continuation of this process of the Oral Torah.
You seem to want to insist that this is not Judaism, only the "First Five Books of the bible" is Judaism.
This is incorrect.
You may believe that Judaism and its Written Torah and its Oral Torah and its Minhagim and its silly hats and its zetzing and gerplopping and all of its zochin are wacky.
You may believe that de Jews are tryin' to pull a fast one on ya here, sayin' that deres more than jus' de Written Torah, but it ain't so.
That's the fac Jac.
So, when a (educated or Torah observant) Jew argues on religion, he is arguing on the Jewish religion, which is based on thousands of years of commentaries and understanding of what G-d commanded His people to do - in His Torah - which encompasses this 3,500 year tradition of the Jews.
You have a perfect right to define your belief system and to believe that the G-d of the Jews or whomever is wacked.
But it is highly illogical for you to tell me or Dauer or any other Jew what it is that they believe.
If I believe the moon is made out of Green Cheese, you are going to tell me "Non, non, mon petite; Zees is not your belief. You really believe ze moon is made out of Pork Sausage?"
I think not.
Oh, and Merry Christmas, ya old Scrooge.