@JHG,
Welcome to teenaged angst.
We pretty much all get it. Best cure for it is to turn 18 or so.
But in the meantime - a few ideas.
- Connect with your friends and spend time with them, either in person if they are in LV or on Skype if they aren't. That is, keep your interactions with your folks separate from your friend interactions.
- Earn some money this summer, if you aren't already. And contribute a small amount of it to the household with each paycheck. You are close to being grown up and could stand to be a part of the household as a semi-adult. I am not talking about a lot of money. It's more like, tell your mom you're going to start paying for all of your own toiletries. Shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, toothbrush, soap, if you need anything for acne, shaving stuff, etc. If you were a girl, I would tell you to add makeup to that list (and if you wear makeup, I won't judge, but how can you keep it on in the Las Vegas heat?). These kinds of contributions will help make you more responsible and will take some of the financial pressure off your mother.
- The way to earn money can be small, as I realize you probably don't have access to a car. You could take care of kids, walk dogs, or house sit for people who are on vacation. You can tend to lawns and you can clean gutters and the like. Even if you are rolling in dough, it can really help your self-esteem and your sense of responsibility to have a job, no matter how small. After babysitting (true story), my first job was wearing a sandwich board sign to advertise a local ticket place. I made $4/hour in 1979, which was above minimum wage. And I used it for exactly what I am talking about - to buy my own personal care products. I still recall that time fondly.
- Try to find ways to spend time with people your age in person, particularly if your friends aren't in the area. You might be able to work for a few weeks at a day camp as a junior counselor. Or there might be summer classes - even if you don't have to or want to study, you might be able to audit a class at a local high school if it's something you'll be taking in the fall back home and you think it might be a difficult subject for you.
- Try to find ways to get out, even if it's not to see friends. I realize LV in the summer is like being in an oven, and you need a car to get pretty much everywhere. Maybe your mother can drop you off somewhere in the morning and get you at noon or later. If there's bus service, even if it's lousy, it might not be so bad if you're not on a set schedule to get anywhere. One thing you might want to try is photography. LV has interesting architecture, and it also has tawdry, tacky stuff. See what you can spot with your phone's camera.
- Another idea is to write. You could journal or even start writing fiction. The library could be a great place for this as it would be (a) out of the house, (b ) air conditioned, and (c ) safe. Plus there are bathrooms, so it's better than just walking around - and it's free. Your writing is good and if it is any indication of how you normally write, then you are over halfway there in terms of getting started with writing. In the interests of full disclosure, I am a published author and I work as a freelance writer so I like to promote people writing. PS Don't worry if you think it stinks. Your first quarter million words (no lie) probably will. Hang in there if you enjoy it.
I'm sorry you feel this way, Jack, and I do understand your concern for your mother. There is also, beyond this, counseling. But I think you may find if you interact more with people outside your family and keep broadening your horizons, some of this angst will be diminished. I also found that music helped a lot, but what I was listening to at your age was Lynyrd Skynyrd and Zep, with a dollop of Fleetwood Mac (it was 1978). That can help, too.
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