Firefighter **** Show

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So this is a long drawn out night but will explain what happened and need some help here.
I am a Firefighter and we did a shift outing at a Cubs game. It turned into a "**** show" like most of us knew it would. The game ended and we ended up going to 2 different bars. The last bar is where **** went down. We were at a Piano bar and I and others I was with were 3 sheets in the wind. One of my coworkers thought it would be funny to take my phone and shoot alot of pictures and make a few movies. This is where it gets good. In the first video I was dancing next to the piano and this girl was next to me and put her leg on me. It alone was pretty amusing because I was getting low which only happens when I am that gone. The next video gets tricky, it shows this girl giving me what appears to be a kiss. I did not initiate it. I was told by friends I was with that she actually licked me. It does not show me embracing her or anything like that. The incident lasted no more than 2 seconds and after that I put my hand on her waist. The video ends as soon as I put my hand on her waist her friend takes her away. (thank god) My wife is claiming that I pulled her closer to her when I grab her hip but I don't see it and neither do my parents. (who have always been very critical of me.)
My wife and I have been married since 2009. I will say that I personally do not remember the incident truly but after that face lick that was the end of our contact. My wife is ready for divorce and is going to extremes with me. I have never cheated on her before and don't believe I did this night. In my opinion I was having fun and that is all. I hate the fact that I hurt my wife and I just saw her Facebook status and she changed it to separated. This is killing me please be honest with this one. Thanks much

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[+3] - ehBeth - 06/23/2017You're going to have to talk to your wife and determine if there is anything you can do to regain her trust. I'd suggest that you be prepared with a list of things you can do - and are willing...

@Mhenby,

I would start with not drinking to the point where you don't know what is going on. It's bad for you, bad for your career, and bad for your marriage.

Next, find folks to hang out with that don't need to get **** face drunk to have fun.

At some point in the process you probably need to sort out that you are a grown man, a husband, maybe a father, definitely a role model to a lot of kids that look up to police and firemen, and probably the hero to more than a few people that you've helped.

You need to have an honest to God conversation with your wife where you genuinely apologize for being terrible (since I'm gonna guess this has happened before), you're going to grow up, and you get that you've been acting like a college frat boy.

Or

Get divorced and continue as you were.

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I will add that in my opinion, she's over reacting, unless there's more to the story. Note that my opinion doesn't matter. What does is her opinion.

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@roger,

I agree with Roger's comment.
There is a certain propensity going on with our firefighter, though, that could use some level of curbing.

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@Mhenby,

You're going to have to talk to your wife and determine if there is anything you can do to regain her trust.

I'd suggest that you be prepared with a list of things you can do - and are willing to do - to develop her trust in you.

___

I know that I'd be concerned if my husband had a habit of going out with his coworkers and getting drunk. I don't know that this is your habit - just saying that's where I'd be worried. I wouldn't be concerned about a one-off face lick.

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