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Tue 20 Jun, 2017 03:29 pm
I really need some advice and not really sure what to think. I have been in a committed relationship for about 2 years now. I have never suspected any cheating and never felt he would ever be the type to cheat. We used to live together as Roomate's(that's how we met) and now he bought a house an hour away. He moved out in may and I commute to see him as often as I can, but I also have a full time job that makes it hard. Sometimes I only see him 3 days a week. I've been starting to get paranoid and worried cause we don't see each other a lot. Me, being the crazy gf I guess i am, I went through his phone while he was sleeping. I know it's a total violation of privacy and trust but I just wanted to know if anything has been going on. Curiosity killed the cat and that's exactly how I felt going through his phone. I ended up first finding through his internet history a local **** tinder site. Which he claims pops up when he watches porn. Then I found out he has been talking to this women he used to have sexual relations with. When confronted he said she text him but doesn't respond. But I saw that they have contacted one another at least 8 times this month, which seems weird to me. Like yeah, you catch up, talk once or whatever but 8 times!! Why have they been talking 8 times this month. Then I took my crazy to the next level because I just need to know if something is going on. So I texted her from his phone. It was around 11:15 at night
Me: hey what are you
Her: hey what's up, I'm watching tv trying to relax
Me: do you wanna come over?
Her: I thought u we're going to come
And that was the end...
That part was what kills me and keeps me in question. Like he denies ever seeing her but it sounds like they might have made plans to see each other, whether it is platonic or sexual. Maybe he didn't cheat but it sounds like he was gonna see her for something. I just need some advice and help, he won't give me an answer about why she would say that and says I have nothing to worry about. Someone please help!!
@Iamlost69,
You already don't trust him, as has been amply proven by your actions.
It's all over but the shouting.
Well you're not crazy. You are just following your gut feeling something is off. Always Follow your gut and sont bury your head in the sand. Better to find out now then yeara down the road.
@Iamlost69,
I agree with Lazybird78- you did what you needed to do because you felt something was off (we all need to trust our instincts more). Sadly I don't think you can try talking this through because he is going to deny everything and lie to you (that's obviously what he has been doing). Walk away now (don't try to hash it out and get answers (as women we do that)- just accept that he's talking to other women and lying. I also agree that as much as it hurts, it's better that you found out now. Good luck
What is HIS perception of your relationship? Is it exclusive?
Why arent you living together after 2 years of what you call "committed"?
Why did he buy a house so far away from you?
The "obvious" is that hes not as serious about you two as you are.
@Ladybird78,
Hi. I am a male (50) who is medically unfit ..... mobility affected. Can I ask you a question about my wife?
@Iamlost69,
Run!! This is not normal behavior and the sheer fact he lied to you about seeing her when they obviously had plans is beyond fishy. Its your call but something seems up I would seriously think about breaking up or taking a break.
@Iamlost69,
if the conversation is like that well then they seeing each other . what you think they'r doing if that girl come over?looking at each other whole the time? if i were you i will just move.on
@Iamlost69,
This dont look good......messages on his phone (Red Flag) Lying about it (Red flag)..you are seeing the truth ...apparently hes not being honest....this is for you to work out its your life............im not gonna tell you what to do (but) Lots of (red Flags) going up....I wish you the best whatever your Decision.
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