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Thu 8 Jun, 2017 11:32 pm
(English is not my first language, therefore please ignore the grammatical mistakes)
Hello,
I have been engaged for about 3 years now. We were suppose to get married later this year. My fiance loves me a lot. She forces me to spend time with her. I don't know how else to say it but she is the clingy type and I am more of a reserved guy. But I love her none the less, may be not as intensely as she does.
But here is what happened that really broke my heart. A week ago I found her receiving sex messages from her ex-class mate. It was going on for about a month. I was devastated to find out this. I immediately told her that it's over and we wont be getting married.
But she begged me not to do that. She said that it was a mistake and it will never ever happen again. I know that she will never do that again. I am also sure that this was only through texting and they never did anything physical. But I am completely devastated and can't believe it, that she could do something like that. So I was firm that marriage is not gonna happen and it's over.
Here is when things got complicated. After 1 day of my refusal, she started getting seizure attacks. When I took her to the hospital they said that she has 'Conversion disorder' - means these seizure attacks are due to a trauma ( breakup). So during her treatment I told her that I forgive her and we are not breaking up. Only after that she started getting back. She is improving now.
I don't know what should i do? To be honest after that incident I don't trust and like her anymore. But since I care for I keep telling her that I am not leaving her so that she can recover from her condition.
Please help.
Thank you so much!
@jzohaib330,
There is no reason for you to go through with a marriage that you do not want simply because of the effect it will have on her. In other words, if you do not want to marry her because of this one instance of her messaging this ex classmate, then don't get married. Conversion Disorder is treatable and will go away once she gets over the stress of losing you.
Of course, if you really love her, maybe forgiving her for this one indiscretion may be the way to go. Maybe it will be only a one time thing with her. That is your call to make though.
Rule 1 for happy life: don't marry crazy woman.
Three years engaged? And she is sexting someone?
How old are you two?
She is not ready to get married. She is emotionally backmailing you. Get a counselor involved asap. You need help in distancing yourself from here!
@jzohaib330,
Which country you belong ? Were you both agree for this relationship I mean you loved each others before engagement or it's done by your family ?
is it done by your family then Surely she isn't a good girl ! now you have to check that she loves you or not ! for this case you have to take help of your friend(female) your classmate or any of your age ! pretend to be his bf and let your engaged girl to know that you are having a relationship with another girl and you have to tell her(engaged ) that you love her(new gf) very much and you wanna be with both girl so if she(engaged) prevents you to have another girl or she wanna breakup bcz of this so she isn't a bad girl and also then you have an option to leave her if you want
@jzohaib330,
If you are going to try and work it out keep an eye on her phone . But if you really don't love her then leave . It's not worth you being unhappy . Being to unhappy is not good for you either .
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