Stuck in a rut

Who knows?

It's like that old bathrobe you won't throw away, even though it's dirty, doesn't fit right, old, and makes you look and feel bad.

Guess it's the habit and comfort of it all. And lacking the energy and being too scared to go out and get a new one.

The problem with answering such a question is there are many possible answers, depending on the person. Usually it's because there is something missing within yourself:
- unhappy, and looking for moments of happiness
- your husband doesn't chase you anymore, and you want to feel like a woman again
- no excitement in your life, and this is how you get it
- low self esteem, and this is how you think it can be fixed (can't be fixed this way)
- ego boost
- addictive personality
- just because you can, even if you feel guilty
- other possible reasons

If your question is 'how do I stop?':

- Find the reasons. There's usually more than one. It can sometimes mean a great deal of self honesty. As a word of warning, never hate what you see - if you don't like it, accept that every single one of us has flaws, and start working to improve.

- Fix the problem. This often requires you to speak up & act, and him to listen and act. Note that there are two parts to play for each party. Often, if you don't find the ability to do this, that's what counselors are for.

- Stop. Usually this comes in the form of changing one habit to another habit. It also means blocking numbers etc. Note that mental discipline (ie consciously choosing not to go down the line of thinking about ####, usually by saying 'every time I find myself thinking of ###, I will instead think of @@@@, and sticking to that) as a promise to yourself, is often needed to assist in stopping (ie breaking the mental habit, helps break the physical habit).

Why do you want to stop?