I just came from Kickycan and Brooke's wedding ceremony.

Forums: Humor
Email this Topic • Print this Page

Brooke looked quite lovely and Kickycan kept muttering over and over, "I can't believe I am finally going to get laid."

Brooke looked at him in disbelief. "You think you're going to get laid, Kicky? I only agreed to marry you because I knew Panzade, Ratzenhofer, BiPolarBear, and Joe Nation would be at the wedding and those four gentlemen would take turns violating me in ways I never thought imaginable. They're men, kicky... real men. Men who pleasure women; men who leave women in the throes of shuddering orgasms. But you? Ha! The only way you can pleasure a woman is by leaving the room. Now go to your room, put on that cheese wedge, and sit in the corner with Occom Bill. When I need to use you guys for a footstool, I'll give you a yell."

Kicky clasped his hands to the side of his face and started to cry.

I had to walk away. It really was pitiful....

http://telegram-franklinnh.com/archives/archives/opera/forum3.jpg

Topic Stats
Top Replies
Link to this Topic

Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 1,768 • Replies: 25

No top replies

the bride wore white?

0 Replies

...and please don't tell me the dress was sleeveless? /the horror

0 Replies

Looks like Kicky forgot to wear his cowboy hat.

0 Replies

yeah, should've covered that chrome-dome with either the fedora or the cheese hat...

0 Replies

Perhaps he shaved his head for the ceremony. I wonder if he shaved anything else, too? I guess we'll have to ask Brooke.

Uh, Broo-ooke.....

0 Replies

the wedding song:
I'm a jackhammer man in a jackhammer town
And I hammer on my hammer 'till the sun goes down.
Tell me how long, do I have to wait?
Oh can I get you now, or must I hesitate?

I was born in Pennsylvania I was raised in France,
I'm a dirty old man and I wear silk pants.
Tell me how long, do I have to wait?
Oh can I get you now, or must I hesitate?

I've a rocket in my pocket and a pickle in my pants,
Come on baby let's lay down and dance.
Tell me how long, do I have to wait?
Oh can I get you now, or must I hesitate?

My rooster he crows and my hen she squawks,
When my baby walks man her body sure talks.
Tell me how long, do I have to wait?
Oh can I get you now, or must I hesitate?

0 Replies

Eva wrote:

Perhaps he shaved his head for the ceremony. I wonder if he shaved anything else, too? I guess we'll have to ask Brooke.

Uh, Broo-ooke.....

Well......

To tell you the truth, Eva......when Kicky arrived wearing a dress Mad

I was too shocked and afraid to look under it.

Therefore.......

I'm not allowing consummation till someone peeks for me. Confused

Gus?? Could you lift up Kickys dress and tell me what you see?

0 Replies

meanwhile Gus was playing the squeezebox and singing:
Don't bogart that joint, my friend
Pass it over to me.
Don't bogart that joint, my friend
Pass it over to me.

Roll another one
Just like the other one.
This one's burnt to the end
Come on and be a friend.

Don't bogart that joint, my friend
Pass it over to me.
Don't bogart that joint, my friend
Pass it over to me.
Ro-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oll another one
Just like the other one.
You've been hanging on to it
And I sure would like a hit.

Don't bogart that joint, my friend
Pass it over to me.
Don't bogart that joint, my friend
Pass it over to me

0 Replies

Brooke was further disgusted when kicky sung this:

I don't just love you down there
I really care about you as a person
I don't just dream of your thighs
for in my eyes
you fill up my skies
with your prize
but I really love you as a person

I keep on dreaming
and scheming
and reaming
you're gleaming
and screaming
tonite

I don't just love you down there
yet I'm aware
what you've got down there
that's where I stare

but I really love you as a person

I really, really do....

0 Replies

Brooke wrote:

Gus?? Could you lift up Kickys dress and tell me what you see?

I raced out to my truck, grabbed a floor dolly, used some duct tape to secure a camera facing upward, and raced back inside. Then, using a 12 foot pole (that's as close as I wanted to get to a dress-wearing Kicky) I pushed the dolly toward and under Kicky's flowing gown. Gingerly I lifted the 12 foot pole against the camera's button, and took the picture.

I examined the image carefully. I can't tell if Kicky shaved. He appears to have a dime up there and something else. What the-?

http://www.colliecorner.com/stick-to-toys/dogphotos/zany-stick.jpg

0 Replies

Sorry to interupt everyone but I have been trying to find Gus. I have important business to take care of.

Gus, are you there?

Good.

SLAP!

I was told I was allowed to do that upon attaining seasoneddom.

Carry on.

0 Replies

Yay Adrian!!!!!!!!!

Now - give a Bunny a li'l smooch?

0 Replies

Wow! I didn't know I got to smooch the bunny too! <smooch>

Or was that just because you like people slapping Gus? Laughing

0 Replies

Man - what a kisser - but you look so YOUNG!!!!

http://www.our-sma-angels.com/evan/images/evankissingbunny.jpg

Well, any slapper of Gus - but, it is a milestone, Adrian!!!!

0 Replies

I think that is a cinnamon stick, Gus?

0 Replies

I read that as "any slapper OR Gus".

Was quite taken aback i was.

0 Replies

Well, now, dear - you take your aback right back, you hear?

0 Replies

My aback was not meant to cause afront. Very Happy

0 Replies

Oh - you have it back to front, and inside out, and handy dandy for that matter!

Your aback caused no affront, rather I feared the mistaken cause of your aback had caused YOU affront!

I am glad you have fronted up to having it ass backwards.

Have you taken any affront back? For I assure you, I have none - though, being a sensitive Bunny, I am not backwards at taking affront. Indeed, some would say that I am forward, generally - both in causing, and taking, affront - an encomium which takes me quite aback.

0 Replies

I just came from Kickycan and Brooke's wedding ceremony.

Related Topics

Quick Links

My Account

able2know