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Sat 3 Dec, 2016 05:00 pm
I was working for this single guy that came to my town for vacation. after one week, we started to talk more and more and the one night we went out and I knew something will happen. It did. He had to leave the next day.. I didn't hear from him for a week, so I just wrote him a txt, a few lines, funny ,caring and just in a polite and nice way… and he replied the same way, sweet but distant and never asked for more…like not even, hey let me know when you are in my city, lets meet up… I have to say, I was working for him, so clearly after something had happened, I had to work for him the last day and it was sooo awequard… we were both so intimidated… so I tried to write a txt but again nothing. he has been separated from his wife for 6 month. so I know there is nothing much to expect at this point and I have to let it go, but how could I stay in touch with him ? I felt I really like this guy and I would so like to get to know him better at one point later in life…
He either thought you were too easy or bad in bed or both.
@giujohn,
well, the feeling was mutual and I couldn't keep him waiting since he was on vacation and this was really the only night we could go out ... the tension built up over the week, we spend 10 h per day together… ( i was taking care of his children, I know .. a classic… and yes sex wasn't to great since it was on the beach…
@seasalt,
seasalt wrote: I didn't hear from him for a week
he replied the same way, sweet but distant and never asked for more
again nothing
I have to let it go
but how could I stay in touch with him ?
let it go
it was a vacation **** for him
an affair is something different
@ossobucotemp,
yes you are right. and also right about, I had sex with him not an affair…
@seasalt,
seasalt wrote:
yes you are right. and also right about, I had sex with him not an affair…
I wanna give a different take on this. If you want to pursue him you need to find some commonality to keep you both talking. Normally if you were locals you would be able to meet up. You don't have that so you have to build on ways to communicate and keep talking. Start simple.. send him funny comments and when he responds build on it. Get him talking. If he wants to know more about you and initiates future texts he's interested.
@seasalt,
I don't mean to batter you about it.
@Krumple,
you know I already did. he gave me a nice bottle of wine when he left, a week later I drank it and wrote him a funny line.. he was polite … saying the vaca already feels far away ( he lives in NY) and that i should enjoy the wine and he wishes me a fun night out , kiss … and that it was nice to hear from me…. so distant and polite… I guess I will leave it for a while and just txt him in a month or two
@seasalt,
seasalt wrote:
you know I already did. he gave me a nice bottle of wine when he left, a week later I drank it and wrote him a funny line.. he was polite … saying the vaca already feels far away ( he lives in NY) and that i should enjoy the wine and he wishes me a fun night out , kiss … and that it was nice to hear from me…. so distant and polite… I guess I will leave it for a while and just txt him in a month or two
Month or two? I'd jump on it. He bought you wine, not exactly the vacation hook up and never look back. The fact he responded in a nice way is something you should take advantage of. I wouldn't wait.
@Krumple,
they were renting a villa… the wine was left, I was working for him, taking care of his kids… it was a nice way to say thank you… I wrote him a week later… I am to scared of being turned down… he should make a move… and he didn't… he just separated … it was his decision… but the wife is heartbroken… so he felt terribly bad… but he knows it over…
@seasalt,
seasalt wrote:
I am to scared of being turned down…
Scared of rejection? Why it's not like you have to face him if he does. I just always find the fear of rejection funny. Too scared to act so you would rather not have than to possibly be rejected. I don't see what's so bad about it. It's not like he's your only shot at love so it's all or nothing.
But sounds like there's no help needed here. You sound convinced it's a done deal so why consider it?
@Krumple,
don´t you feel that a guy needs to make the move ? we were both really insecure and it was so akeward since I was working for him… I am 36, he is 44
@Krumple,
don´t you think a guy needs to make the move !?? I already txted him after a week, he did not ! He replied but also saying not much more… what could I say ?
@seasalt,
seasalt wrote:
don´t you think a guy needs to make the move !?? I already txted him after a week, he did not ! He replied but also saying not much more… what could I say ?
Some guys need a little push sometimes..
@seasalt,
seasalt wrote:
well, the feeling was mutual and I couldn't keep him waiting since he was on vacation and this was really the only night we could go out ... the tension built up over the week, we spend 10 h per day together… ( i was taking care of his children, I know .. a classic… and yes sex wasn't to great since it was on the beach…
Ya...been there. Sand in either crack is a bitch.
@seasalt,
Why settle for less, go find a man who will make you #1. Nobody puts "seasalt" in the corner. lol
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