LOST & MISPLACED A2K people.

REALLY liked Rick. Hope he gets back this way.

See, it did exist!

I was looking for that thread all over the place last week ... I knew I'd posted to it, it had to be there somewhere, but I couldnt find it.

Had wanted to post there that I missed Rick - and that I missed Drom very much. Whatever she did wrong, she was a great, inventive, pleasant poster while she was here, providing much-needed hi-quality distractions from the usual stuff. Original and surprising. She was perhaps my second- or third-most appreciated poster, period.

As soon as PMs are back up I'll drop her an email - address is in a PM ...

I'm missing lots of folks...bandylu, Kara, cobalt, Debacle, beddlesquoink, Mapleleaf, mags, and where oh where has my patiodog gone?

The mystery of the vanishing Missing thread, nimh. I got tired of trying to post to it, waiting for it to be reinstated & started this one after Walter & letty suggested starting a new one.

Swimpy

I just read this:

Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.

I love it!

I don't understand about drom either, habibi. It seems no one is allowed to ask about these things either.

Oh yeah! Bandylu. She always made this newbie feel so welcome on her old Abuzz threads. She and retired husband have moved to pennsylvania, of course, but haven't heard from her in ages.

Last time mags was heard from, she was getting married, with his and her cats, had recovered nicely from knee or hip surgery, and seemed to be doing nicely.

Somehow, I have always felt some sort of affinity for Bandylu, Boomerang, Swimpy, and mags. It's a difficult thing to explain.

Maybe it's your feminine side showing, rog.

I'm sure the administrators had a damn good reason to do what they did. I accept their word for it, they're good folk. Doesn't mean I don't miss her though, thats two wholly separate things.

Also I think that the whole issue has needlessly taken other posters out along with her, just people trying to help - and that I kind of resent, though I dont know enough to judge. Just feel vaguely chagrined about it.

Of the people you mention, yeah, Patiodog - you're right, he (he?) was brilliant, and very funny. I miss Kara too, she's probably still posting in the US/UN/Iraq thread? And Cobalt, yeah.

Yes, nimh. I agree with you.

I just thik it's a shame that the drom situation was so MYSTERIOUS for so long! You knew it was taboo to talk about it, but you weren't sure why. It just didn't feel good & wasn't great for A2K morale. I'm certain, like you, that the moderators were acting responsibly, but it was so confusing, for so long ... I certainly appreciated Jespah's post yesterday.

I'm not saying the moderators aren't good people. It's just that people get disappeared and nobody talks about it. Seems wrong somehow.

I think that's what I was saying, too, Swimpy.

Ack - I think these situations are always damned if you, and damned if you don't.

Hmm, well I agree that the moderators know more than any of us and I happen to have met Jespah and know for sure that she is level headed and fair. It's hard to know how to feel, especially when having it made public might hurt other people needlessly.

Kara has lots going on in her life and posts only on a few threads and sporadically, but she adds so much whenever she posts that she is missed even if she is absent for a week. Lots of good people just can't take the time to post as regularly as we would like. I hope they know they are missed.

The mods have a heads they lose tails they lose situation there, as "talking about it" usually means justifying it to those who are curious, and to do so they'd probably have to speak negatively of someone.

They signed up for a volunteer task that did not include bad-mouthing someone in order to answer second guessing about their duties.

People will always want to be in the know, but I'm not sure they consider the flip side of that desire (i.e. whether it's a reasonable demand on those who would have to do the telling).

IMO, the standing policy in this regard is one of necessity. Jespah explained a lot of the reasons for this here, in an announcement that few have read and fewer have connected to their concerns about why moderators do some things the way they do.

CDK you guys (Jes) said a lot of good and useful info in that announcement.

oh I cannot remember seeing Jerry Rice??

On another board I visited they would have a list of people who were banned or temporarily banned. The interesting thing was that this did not serve as some kind of public, you know, pillory. Most were only temporarily banned for a minor infraction anyway, and would rejoin the fold later. In the meantime, people knew what was up.

Cause I agree, now people just get disappeared when they're banned (not just talking about drom here), and others are left wondering why someone suddenly left, or whether something wrong was said, or why someone suddenly doesn't respond to PMs anymore - you know? Its kind of eerie. Because it generally seems to be taboo to just say, sorry, "he got banned".

I know a list like that might look like some pillory, but in fact it could help those who're banned as well. Because now they just get locked out, with no way of contacting old A2K mates anymore, not even to tell them what is up or to pass them their personal email. They have to rely on having perhaps an email address of someone who is still on and ask them to pass along such info - possibly bringing them into trouble in their turn. I'd have to ask Soz or Dag to contact any others I might want to stay in touch with, for example - and then rely on the grapevine getting the message across. I dunno, that does seem kind of wrong.

Just my two cents ...

As someone who had "been there, done that", I can only say that the job of a Moderator can be, at times, very frustrating, and agonizing, especially when dealing with a long time member. Moderators discuss each serious situation in depth, and attempt to come up with a consensus that is both fair to the member, and consonant with the A2K Terms of Use.

In my experience, I can say that if a member is banned permanently, it is for a damned good reason.

Phoenix

I'm sure that's right. And I have the greatest respect & admiration for the work the moderators do here.

I also like nimh's "list" idea, too, though I suspect it might not appeal to everyone. Someone could be legitimately banned for a transgression, yet other members can be left wondering what's happened to them, thinking that they appeared to have just vanished into thin air. The connections between individual people are different to moderating requirements. At least a "list" would let people know they're OK & would perhaps limit some of the more fanciful speculation about what actually happened.