THE BACON TREE

The Bacon Tree

Back in the cowboy days a westbound wagon train was lost and low on food. No other humans had been seen for days, until the lookout finally saw an old Jewish man sitting beneath a tree.

The wagon train leader rushed up to him and said, "We're lost and running out of provisions. Is there someplace ahead where we can get food?" "Vell," the old Jewish man said, "I vouldn't go up dat hill und down the other side. Somevun told me you'll run into a big bacon tree."
"A bacon tree?" asked the wagon train leader. "Yah, a bacon tree. Trust me. For nuttin' vould I lie."

The leader went back and told his people that if nothing else,they might be able to find food on the other side of the next ridge. "So why did he say not to go there?" someone asked. "Oh, you know those Jews -- they don't eat bacon."

So the wagon train went up the hill and down the other side. Suddenly, Indians attacked and massacred everyone except the leader, who managed to escape and go back to talk to the old Jew, who was still sitting beneath the tree.
The exhausted leader shouted, "You fool! You sent us to our deaths! We went up the hill and down the other side, but there was no bacon tree, just hundreds of Indians who killed everyone!"

The old Jew held up his hand and said "Oy, vait a minute." He then got out an English-Yiddish dictionary, and began thumbing through it. "Gevalt, I made myself a big mistake. It vas not a bacon tree... It vas a ham bush!"