my bestfriends a control freak..i need help!

First question, why is she your friend? Sounds like she's either obsessed, using you, or obsessed with using you!

because weve had good and bad times..in the past she wasnt like that and when u have like a really good friend its hard to let them go.i really dont know what to do.she always wins the arguments we have and stuff.
shes like allowed to call me stupid but im not aloud to call her stuff joking around.she like controls me!i dont know what 2 do cuz everything i do to rebel pisses her off.

It's a sad fact of life that sometimes we outgrow friendships. I think that is what has happened. She is no longer a real friend. Don't let your history blind you to what she has become....a bully.

Move on. There are plenty of other potential friends out there, if you give them a chance.

I know exactly how you feel, I have played both those roles. I know you feel she's your best friend and you don't think you can leave her, you will be much happier once you do. It will take alot of time to let her go, but once you start to, you will realize that she really isn't a very good friend at all. She likes you because she can control you, if you rebel long enough she'll start ditching you. Really, I've been there. You don't need to give your time to someone like that.

Regarding your controlling Friend
If you are in high school or college, then don't let it go on for 13 years like I did. My friend was exactly the same way, however, we met when
I was 26 and now I'm 40. I will tell you that when I stood up to my Best Friend, she did the same thing as yours is doing now. My friend was very bossy as well.

She had to control everything, and was manipulative. If she didn't get her way, she would either criticize me for my choice or would try to find fault with the way I would coordinate a vacation. Her choices were always better then mine! Just take an older woman's advice, get some major courage up - and dump her. You'll be better off. Go to Oprah's website and under friendships and previous shows you will find a toxic friend check list with great questions regarding the kind of friendship you have.

I will tell you that there are many variables that bring certain types of friends and personalities together. One dynamic is the Narcissist and the person who is attracted to them. Type in the word Narcissist on the website and once you start reading up on the profile of what a narcissist is and the people attracted to them, you will find freedom from your toxic friend. Read the book: "Children of the Self Absorbed" by: Nina W. Brown. That is a great book if you are attracted to a destructive narcissist or if you find yourself surrounded by them in primary relationships. Good luck and remember no one ever deserves to be treated less then what they give in any relationship. Hence the saying: Treat those like you would want to be treated".

If anyone treats you less then you deserve and you continue to let them, then it becomes your problem. Your friend is just doing what works for her. The minute you don't take part in it, she'll either realize you've been the best friend she has or ever will have and change, or she'll move on to someone else who is easier to manipulate or control. P.S. Teasing or critizing or any form of ridicule is a form of bullying and a form of emotional abuse. Don't put up with it for one more second of one more day.

Godspeed!

I never ever thought I would be on the oprah site, but in all honesty, it was quite good. So thanks roachgirl for the info.....good advise....welcome to a2k!!!!

Friends that use you suck.