I've tried so much. Im done now.

Its been a long road man. Long and weary. Guess theres some things I need to get off my chest and hopefully I’ll feel better. No better place than here to vent a bit. So where can I start, in my previous post I was talking about my ex contacting again, talking a lot and giving some mixed signals. It didn’t lead to anything though, tried to get to see her, didn’t happen, and about a week ago I called her because I know we wont be talking as much when school starts, so I wanted to know whats up with us.

I called , told her I think about her a lot, right there she said to stop thinking about her so much, and I guess I never wanted to say more, that alone kindve gave away her attitude and what she would’ve wanted from all this contacting. I would say I was a fool for being there and eating breadcrumbs but I don’t regret it, because I cant lie to myself. Truth is I will always love this girl, and I would always care about her very much. The memories I had with her will stay with me and I’ll remember her fondly always. Im glad that aleast now we are on better terms and if I ever see her it wont be awkward.

I don’t regret anything. I tried with her, god alone knows how much I did. I tried after we broke up, a month after that, when she contacted me and dropped the mixed signals I asked her if we could ever start over, she said no and then she doesn’t know, then kept sending breadcrumbs and again after almost a year we started talking again I tried again, I really did, I knew what I wanted, I got over her we started talking again and she brushed me off. I am angry but im happy that now im done. When I called her I wished her the best and haven’t talked to her since, her birthdays coming up but that’s not my concern she wont be hearing from me.

Funny thing is I know I’ll hear from her again, maybe not soon but in a month or 2 something will come up again. Shes just like that because forgetting what we had will be hard for her, I had time to heal, she just jumped into a new environment with new things and new people. So yeah maybe some breadcrumb again soon but I wont be around. After 4 years it should be put to rest, we’ve been broken up over a year now. Theres nothing there again and I truly don’t want it anymore, I did before that’s why I tried so hard, why I tried everytime she came and started talking again. Im done trying now.

Whats there to do again, wait to see her, she keeps saying she’ll see me sometime but never made an effort. And its just excuses. She lives lik 20 mins away from me, her school is like 90 mins drive, so if I had to see her I would’ve seen her already. All that talking for 3 months was leading to nothing, I thought it would the way we talked, her especially just the way she talked and acted. Idk man I just lost hope now, if she wanted to be with me she would’ve done things to show me that, all the contacting is childs play and I don’t have time for it anymore.

If someones reading this and feeling heartbroken, take this coming from a guy who burnt a lot, spent weeks on about 20 forums looking for help and answers. Just walk away. Human nature is to run away from harm but when we love people we tend to forget that. Don’t allow yourself to be hurt so much. Im SURE theres so much people out there who can make u happy.

I was feeling heart broken for so long, #1 contributor for that feeling was I was just sitting and thinking, never made that effort to move on. You should do something, and I mean something with physical aspects. Don’t read a book, don’t watch a movie, life and healing is outside the doors, meet people, try new things new people and bounce back, the punctured ball stays flat but the deflated ball can have air again. So get moving. Thanks for reading I hope you feel better, and u will

As for me. Im gonna take a shower and try to get a six pack lol.. For my abs .. So what are you gonna do??????????